5 Sensual Self-Love Dates this Valentine’s Day

5 Sensual Self-Love Dates this Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is not just meant for couples. It is a celebration of LOVE! Who better to celebrate love with than yourself? In fact, did you know that February 13, the day before Valentine’s Day, is International Self-Love Day? This holiday was created to remind us to show ourselves love – not just in mid-February but every day.

Imagine that you are planning a hot date for your lover. Imagine making dinner reservations at your favorite restaurant. Imagine creating the perfect romantic scene for lovemaking after dinner. You take extra time to set the scene just right with candles, dim lighting, and maybe even fresh flowers. It is totally worth making this extra effort to bring pleasure and joy to your lover.

What about making the same effort for yourself? What about showing yourself the same love, care, and attention?

This February, I dare you to create a Sensual Self-Love Date for yourself. Sensual Self-Love Dates stimulate your five senses of touch, taste, smell, hearing, and sight. The dates allow you to nurture yourself and get turned on, so you walk away feeling cared for, nourished, and overflowing with love and joy. No matter how stressed or tired you may feel, your Sensual Self-Love Date will re-energize you and get you turned on, so you glow and light up from within.

Below are 5 Sensual Self-Love Date ideas. Choose one to enjoy or try all 5.

Sensual Self-Love Date Idea #1: Flower Fantasy

Purchase a fresh bouquet of roses (any color you like). Fill your bathtub with warm to hot water (whatever temperature you love to bathe in). Hold the base of one flower with one hand. With your other hand, grab all the flower petals near the base and gently twist until the petals come loose. Toss the rose petals into the bathtub. Repeat with all the roses until the bathtub is full of rose petals.

Light a few candles and dim the lights. Play relaxing spa music or shamanic drumbeats.

Enjoy an amazing sensual, luxurious bath experience. Notice how beautiful your body looks in the bath with rose petals. Allow yourself to feel beautiful like the roses. Breathe in the scent of the rose petals. Touch your body all over in a sensual way, gently caressing and massaging your legs, arms, stomach, and breasts/chest. If it feels good, gently caress your face. Caressing = Caring. Show your body that you care about it by caressing it.

Sensual Self-Love Date Idea #2: Massage

Treat yourself to a relaxing massage (or even better, a whole spa day). Beforehand, let your family and work know that you are taking time for self-care and will not be checking your phone for the next few hours. Allow yourself to be present and totally enjoy your massage. If your mind swirls with busy thoughts, bring your attention to your body. Notice the pleasurable sensations your body experiences as it is massaged. Allow yourself to relax and let go.

Sensual Self-Love Date Idea #3: Sensual Picnic

Create a fun picnic for yourself with items that stimulate your senses. Gather delicious fruits such as strawberries with chocolate sauce (for a healthy chocolate sauce, melt coconut oil. Then add cacao powder and your favorite low-glycemic sweetener like Stevia or monk fruit). Think of drinks and foods that light you up. Examples: Champagne, sparkling water, chocolate, figs, blueberries, or popcorn.

Find a comfortable, cozy picnic blanket. If you live in a warm climate, go to a gorgeous garden or park. If you are in a cold climate, create an indoor picnic on your living room floor (for extra fun, search on YouTube for “Nature scene” or “Picnic background music” and play in the background on your TV, phone, or computer).

Enjoy your sensual foods and drinks thoroughly. For a few bites, close your eyes as you chew, so you can focus on fully tasting the flavors and enjoying the temperature, textures, and sensations. Notice how cool and juicy the strawberry feels. Notice the lightness and effervescence of the champagne or sparkling water. If you are outside, notice the warmth of the sun shining upon your skin. Simply enjoy the sensual splendor of your sensual picnic!

Sensual Self-Love Date Idea #4: Sexual Self-Pleasure

When is the last time you had mind-blowing, earth-shattering sex all by yourself? Most of us rush through or bypass our own self-pleasure or masturbation. Allow yourself to take your time and let your self-pleasure be a nourishing experience. Choose a beautiful place for sexual self-pleasure, such as your bed or your flower fantasy bathtub (from Sensual Self-Love Date Idea #1 above). Light candles, play relaxing music, and create a beautiful scene for yourself.

Lovingly touch your body all over. Allow yourself to get turned on. Tease yourself by touching your inner thigh or anywhere that feels pleasurable. Then when you are feeling hot and overflowing with sensation and desire, begin to touch your sacred genitals. Allow this to be a loving, self-care experience.

Sensual Self-Love Date Idea #5: Self-Love List

Make yourself a delicious cup of tea, coffee, or beverage of your choice. Turn on relaxing music. Sit down with pen and paper (or an open document on your computer). Make a list of 30 things you love and appreciate about yourself. Why are you absolutely amazing? Include positive qualities that you possess, such as your big loving heart and sense of humor. Include physical attributes like your beautiful smile. Include kind things you have done for others and accomplishments that you are particularly proud of from your life. Dig deep into all the reasons to love yourself. Revisit this list regularly, especially when you are stuck in a rut or feeling down.

Which Sensual Self-Love Date idea will you try? Or feel free to create your own. Enjoy filling yourself with love this International Self-Love Day. 


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Authentic and Free is a thought-provoking work of creative nonfiction that will inspire you to transform self-doubts into self-love by discovering your inner beauty, strengths and light. It’s time to set aside rules and expectations, be the powerful person you came here to be and experience the sweet freedom of an authentic life!

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