For many of us, the fifteen months of lockdown and restricted activities were extremely challenging in every area of life. As life began to open up again in recent months, we experienced hope and optimism that normalcy was on the return.

Most of us started getting out more, giddy to be social and hug our friends and loved ones that we haven’t seen beyond a Zoom screen for so long.

And some of us have even jumped on a plane and done some traveling.

Plans that couldn’t be made previously (whether career or personal) are popping up and you may be feeling like it’s time to dive back in, make a new list of goals and accomplishments, restart your life and go for it.

Except your previous “get up and go” is now stalling, procrastinating, overthinking, worrying or all of the above.

More than thirty years ago I had the extraordinary good fortune to meet Herb Tanzer and Elizabeth Goodman.

I was attending the Landmark Forum and Herb was our awesome, amazing and brilliant leader.

Throughout the weekend workshop he often gushed about how much he loved his beautiful wife, Elizabeth.

Herb & Elizabeth were really my first introduction into what a true soulmate relationship looks like.

Together they were adoring, devoted, playful, funny and clearly meant to be together.

After 38 years of loving each other, Herb passed a year ago from cancer.

Of course, Elizabeth was devastated to lose her best friend, life partner and soulmate.

Toward the end of his life, they had several deep conversations in which Herb shared with Elizabeth that she needed to “pay attention.” He wanted her to be open to finding someone to take care of her after he was gone.

Elizabeth always insisted she could take care of herself. Herb repeatedly told her to “pay attention.”

One of Herb’s closest friends was another Forum leader named Garry.

He was a recent widower. His wife of 55 years, Donna, had passed less than a year before Herb. The four of them had been friends for 35 years and had vacationed together.

If you’re anything like me, the last fifteen months on planet earth have been challenging, at times nerve shattering, and stressful to the max.

I’ve been craving peace.

Something that has really made a difference in returning me to a state of peace and contentment is a guide written by my friend, Sadhviji, who has spent the last 25 years in India as a holy woman studying the Vedas in English and Hindi.

She went from working on a Ph.D. on psychology at Stanford to running one of the largest ashrams in Rishikesh for the past twenty-five years, and she serves hundreds of thousands of devotees around the world as one of todays’ pre-eminent spiritual teachers.

Disappointment. We’ve all been there.

Whether it was the promising new relationship, the job interview that seemed so right, the passion project that didn’t pan out, we have all known the disappointment of not having our big dream met.

Even though the feelings of loss and sadness that come with disappointment totally suck, there are actions you can take to move you back into possibility.

When this happens to me, I give myself permission to spend a few minutes to experience my sad and blue feelings. Then I will journal these feelings and really exaggerate just how bad I feel. I let my imagination run wild on the negative side just to purge it all.

Next, I take a few moments to close my eyes, drop into my heart and remind myself of all the goodness in my life as I practice breathing deeply in and out through my heart.

Finally, I get my journal out again and this time I write myself five true and positive statements about my life.

Twenty-three years ago, on June 22, I married my soulmate, Brian, in a beautiful, magical Hindu ceremony officiated by the hugging saint, Amma.

What I didn’t know on that auspicious day could fill a book!

Leading up to the wedding, I had never given any thought as to what kind of wife and partner I would be to him.

Having written and manifested my extensive “soulmate wish list,” I had high expectations of what was in it for me, but never really thought about what was in it for him.

Early on in our marriage I made a horrifying discovery about myself: I had no partnership skills!

Having run a business for many years, I knew how to be the “boss” but was clueless about how to be a great partner.

Fortunately, Brian spent a good part of his life playing team sports and working in collaborative business partnerships. He modeled how to “play well with others.”

Over the years I’ve learned from him and became better at surfing the relationship waves.

Seeking more love in your life?

A fast, easy way to make it happen is to put your attention on all the love that is already around you (family, friends, pets, etc.) and then actively engage in making love happen and spread by creating a “ripple effect.”

Everything we do and think affects the people in our lives and the choices we make have far-reaching consequences. Like an incredibly interwoven and complicated tapestry, the Ripple Effect, creates connections that we are all a part of. Thoughts and actions are like stones dropped in a pond and they create ripples that travel outward.

Have you ever wondered why we humans seek a soulmate?

What is it about us that craves this deep connection to another?

Where does our yearning come from?

Are we genetically designed to be mated?

One fascinating and possible answer comes from Aristophanes, the acclaimed playwright and philosopher of ancient Athens.

He offers a wild tale that he shared at Plato’s Symposium about how the deep desire for Oneness came about.

Long, long ago in primal times people had doubled bodies: four arms, four legs, two heads and they were big and round….

These roly-poly creatures wheeled around earth like clowns doing cartwheels & were very powerful.

There were three sexes: the all-male, the all-female, and those who were half male, half female.

After the more than a year of lockdown and the global nightmare we’ve all experienced, it’s time we dive into a summer of fun and celebration.

You deserve it.

Your family deserves it.

And, like all successful manifesting, we must begin with a clear vision of what our heart’s desire is.

Begin by thinking about all the things that represent summer to you: Activities, Food, Special events, things to see and do.

Since we don’t have any major vacations to Tuscany or Bali planned,

I desire my Summer 2021 to be a daily celebration of love, life, and lots of fun and I’m declaring that my Summer begins TODAY.

In no particular order, here’s what is on my list:

Traditionally the word feminine has been defined as having qualities traditionally ascribed to women, such as sensitivity, gentleness, being demure, modest, or delicate.

This seems so limited and last mid-Century to me.

In my coaching I often come across women who don’t believe they have the right to ask for what they most want, need, and desire, feeling that if they do ask, they will either be rejected or seen as too aggressive.

This happens in both their business life and romantic relationships.

Oy.

I believe that part of the problem comes from being raised on a diet of books and movies with the theme “let’s all become princesses” as we hope that someday Prince Charming will magically arrive and kiss us out of our comas.

Ugh.

Ladies, don’t you think it’s time to embrace your “Inner Queen” and step into your power and fierceness?

How do you envision God, Goddess, the Universe or whatever “divine” being you pray to?

Sometimes when I’m in a goofy mood, and I hear someone tell me what’s not possible for them to manifest, I imagine that “being” is like the “Soup Nazi” on Seinfeld.

Remember him?

He was a cantankerous owner of a soup bar in New York City and when you placed your ordered, if you asked for anything extra or special, he would angrily yell, “No soup for you!”

God/Goddess/Universe is not checking a clipboard deciding what you can and cannot have but when you decide, in advance, what is or isn’t possible for you, it’s YOU that blocks the possibility.

I think one of the hardest things about manifesting is managing our judgmental, critical, untrusting monkey mind.

Clutter. It blocks the flow of energy and gets in the way of manifesting our deepest desires.

We know how to unclutter the physical items in our lives and now, thanks to my friend Peggy Fitzsimmons, she is sharing with us today her views on letting go of relationship clutter. Enjoy!

“Our souls are inherently free and our true nature is love. And we also have ego minds that orient us towards self-preservation, lack, and scarcity. When the ego is in the driver’s seat, we relate from fear and separation. If conflict, competing, or power struggles are the norm in your relationships, your ego likely has a tight grip on the wheel. When you fail to treat yourself or someone else as a human being, your ego is present in that moment of relationship. In contrast, when the soul is in the driver’s seat, we relate from safety and connection. If your relationships are characterized by harmony, collaboration, and compassion, your soul is at the wheel. When you treat yourself or someone else with kindness, acceptance, and neutrality, your soul is present for that relationship moment.

The ego drives us to accumulate relationship clutter. Here are some examples: