“Your past does not have to determine your future. Forgive yourself and set yourself free.”
As human beings, we can feel judged by others, especially by ourselves, for the "bad decisions" we made in the past. Ultimately, regret is a waste of time. Listen to this episode to learn the 4 keys to getting out of the mental loop of feeling tormented by your past mistakes, and being able to face your reality with a new perspective that helps you evolve and accept yourself as is and live more authentically as you.
“To be in a state of peace we need to be in harmony with the energy frequency of peace.” ~Codebreaker
Peace is your natural state. However, we are all experiencing stress and frustration in these challenging times.
Are you your own worst enemy? Do your regrets and pains run through your mind like a broken record? Are you still beating yourself up for saying the “wrong” thing, getting a parking ticket last month, or eating that tub of ice cream last night? Do you know how to forgive yourself?
There is so much information about the healing powers of forgiveness but do we take the time to forgive ourselves? Of all the emails I’ve received from my audience over the years, self-forgiveness and how to practice it has been in the top 5 of all topics. And, it seems that almost every reading I’ve done, especially mediumship touches on something that the person has to forgive themselves for.
Here’s a great question to think about:
What if you treated your most cherished friend just as you treated yourself?
Forgiveness, peace, love and joy…
How good would it feel to immerse yourself in these high frequency codes?
Imagine how different this week might be if you could wrap yourself in a white light blanket of peace…
A cozy comforter of forgiveness and love enveloping you at every moment…
How would that change this week for you?
How would that change your entire year?
Think about that for a moment.
Are you ready to feel it? You can!
Take a few deep breaths…imagine a column of white light coming in and down, filling your whole body. This is your True Self, the perfection that you are.
We often hear people talk about why we should forgive but rarely do they explain the how. Forgiveness! I’ll be the first to admit that forgiveness is sometimes a struggle for me. I just completed seminary school and during my studies, every time we had to randomly pick a topic in class…I would pull forgiveness. But, I firmly believe that all things always work together for my highest good and greatest joy and this journey of forgiveness has taught me some things about life, myself, and allowing this Divine Energy and Essence that I call God access into the inner most parts of myself. The Rev. Johnnie Colemon, used to say…lessons are not taught they are caught. Which means experience is the greatest teacher.
So what is forgiveness…have you heard that it’s to give for…for example…give up hate for love...give up fear for faith. That’s a simple way of explaining forgiveness.
It's painful and natural as human beings to want to get revenge to pay them back, to show them, to prove to them, to crush them.
But realize, when someone does something negative to you, when someone trespasses against you, to simply return the same energy is to simply bring yourself down to that level and nothing ever gets truly resolved by going down to that level.
Not only do you pull yourself down to that level, you keep yourself stuck.
It may sound strange and improbable, but this short article explains how it’s possible to actually change your past, and let go of any painful experience that wants to haunt you. The secret lies in awakening a little-known skill that every person is given at birth, but that few ever realize they have: the ability to start life over any time we choose.
It’s true: today is the first day of our life; but this truth is only of use to us if we know how to turn its power into something practical that can free us from the painful regrets and disappointments carried over from our past.
It may seem at first like starting life over every moment is a daunting and impossible task, but there is a simple method of bringing this power within our ready grasp. Here’s how we get started winning our new life: we must learn to allow every movement in our life – every unwanted memory, every emotion, every thought, and every relationship we have with whatever moves through us – to have its own life.
The overall theme that the cards reveal this week in the Weekly Oracle Card Guidance and Lesson is forgiveness. Who or what do you need to forgive?
I know forgiveness may seem like one of those intangible ideals that’s just out of reach or a waste of time. But, it’s not. You can make the choice to forgive. And by taking that decision, you not only move forward on your path, but you also open the door to Spirit’s messages.
Resentment, anger, shame, and regret all keep you focused on the past and block you from accessing the realm of connection. In addition to robbing you of the present, lack of forgiveness feeds your ego mind, your Goblin, and keeps you in a “Me Bubble.” Forgiveness is one of the greatest keys to strengthening your intuition and making positive changes in your life.
I would not be where I am today if it weren’t for forgiveness. After years of abusive relationships, drinking, and trying to numb my pain, I had a spiritual epiphany in which I realized that I had to forgive if I wanted to move forward. Through giving up the need to be hurt and to hate, I’ve been able to finally have the amazing, healthy relationship I’d always wanted.
Rumi invites us to find the barriers we’ve erected against love, and a universal one is blame. These three talks are an invitation to relax those barriers, and to open our hearts to our inner life and to all beings. Part I focuses on chronic self-judgment; Part II on the places of deep self-condemnation, and Part III on where we have locked into anger, blame or hatred of others. Each includes guided reflections that can support us in directly awakening beyond the confining thoughts and feelings of blame.
“Your task is not to seek for love,
but merely to seek and find
all the barriers within yourself
that you have built against it.” ~ Rumi
My whole life, I had been my worst critic. I was my own judge, jury and executioner. I strove for perfection, sought validation and felt that I have to compete for everything in order to deserve something. This is a result of people — most especially my family— criticizing me, telling me in many different ways how I was not good enough and how I need to be different and do better. Undoing that damage is neither easy nor quick. The solution was both simple and complicated but I am now peeling away the ugly layers that covered up my true self.
Growing up, I was constantly ‘teased’ about my flaws. My skin was too dark. My smile was too gummy. My lower lip was too thick. I was too skinny, too shy, too weak, too clumsy, too slow. There was a never-ending list of things that’s ‘wrong’ with me. And those were mostly from my own family — cousins, uncles and aunts, grandparents, siblings, and my mom. For who I was and whatever I did, I was simply not good enough. I felt like I could never measure up to standards set by those around me.
One of my first memories were of my parents broken up. I don’t remember them being together at all. Before my father died when I was 17, I remember seeing him only twice. I guess, this is where it all started, as a little girl asking, “Why doesn’t he want to see me? Am I not good enough for him?” That feeling of being unwanted by him didn’t leave me until I was about 18. Did I have daddy issues? Perhaps. I’ll leave that to the experts. But I honestly think that this is not the only culprit that eroded my self-worth.
When I admit I’ve been wrong
and that you’ve been true, I want to pick up
all I’ve broken with my insistence and bring
you flowers you’ve never seen.
This is what it means to make amends.
When a misunderstanding unravels,
I want to linger in that clearing, and put
aside our beliefs, which weigh us down
like old iron castings we’ve carried
around for generations.
“The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves.” — Victor Hugo
I have to say, there were more than a few times last week when I thought, “What is happening in our world?”
The way Jeff Bezos took on the National Enquirer made me gasp for all sorts of reasons. But I love what he said: if someone in his position can’t fight back against blackmail and extortion, then who can?
I also found myself shaking my head during the State of the Union. I was upset by the visible division in our country and how it was on full display in the room. You could have turned off the sound and still fully seen and understood how one half of the room felt about the other. (I must say, though, I was inspired by the guests in attendance. Their inspiring life stories give me hope.)
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” — Buddha
Forgiveness is the key that opens the door to inner peace and the ability to fully connect with the love that we are.
Without forgiveness, inner peace remains a lofty, distant ideal.
Is there someone you need to forgive? A relative… an old friend… possibly even yourself?
When we say forgiveness, we mean real forgiveness. We’re not talking about lip service as the ego mind sits in judgement and promises forgiveness that never really comes.
Real forgiveness happens when we trust the True Self to make the decisions that uplift, empower and enlighten our lives.
So, how do you put the past behind you?
Here are four tips I’d like to share with you today to help you heal your old wounds and move on to a better and brighter future.
1. Practice Forgiveness
Whether it’s forgiving yourself for a mistake that you made or forgiving someone who you believe harmed you, forgiveness is one of the best possible things you can do to heal yourself from the past.
You may have heard the saying, “Holding onto anger and resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” It’s true. When you continue to be angry and bitter about something that has happened in the past, the only person you end up hurting is yourself.
Scientists have discovered there are emotional, mental, and even physical needs for forgiveness.
Every cell in your body acts like a computer. Each cell has an electromagnetic energy field and a biochemical composition that instantly responds to your environment — and to your thoughts.
According to well-documented discoveries in epigenetics, genetic inheritance is only a predisposition. Whether it is triggered or not is dependent on the individual’s programs.
What does that mean? It means that more than anything else, the body’s response to our conscious and unconscious thoughts determines your health and happiness.
Now, here’s the really good news! To forgive is the soul’s choice.
That’s right, your soul has a choice!
When you think of a martial artist in a ready posture, do you see someone who is fully present? Who is undistracted? Who is in their perfect point of power? Ready for anything, balanced, capable of utilizing all of their resources and resourcefulness?
That is what Peace is like...
PEACE is the P in PLATINUM
When you are fully connected to your True Self, the Peace code is activated as your natural high frequency state.
This is the state of harmony, balance and tranquility where you are fully present and automatically seek the highest good for all.
Wouldn’t you love to live in that state all the time?
Are you holding onto feeling wronged? Try the practice of forgiveness.
First, forgiveness has two distinct meanings:
- To give up resentment or anger
- To pardon an offense; to stop seeking punishment or recompense
Here, I am going to focus on the first meaning, which is broad enough to include situations where you have not let someone off the hook morally or legally, but you still want to come to peace about whatever happened. Finding forgiveness can walk hand in hand with pursuing justice.
We have all done things that we regretted, that we felt bad about and judged ourselves for.
Whether it was:
The choices you made in a past relationship.
The way you handled a break up.
The life you thought you should have had.
What are you still judging yourself for?
Judging what you did in the past keeps you stuck in the past. You can’t change the past no matter how much you judge.
Holding yourself hostage to your past only serves to limit your ability to create your future.
Embrace that you are human. You will make “mistakes”. Your soul incarnated onto this planet to learn, grow and evolve. The way you grow is through experiences and lessons.
It is impossible to change the relationship we have with the world around us without changing the relationship we have within ourselves. This is the secret teaching of the ages.
Our task, if we want to be free human beings -- if we want a life in which we no longer carry around with us "what he did," "what she didn't do," "what never worked out" -- begins with discovering that there can be no real freedom for us until we understand the nature of the tyranny of the past that still lives within us. And one of the main areas of this unchallenged dictatorship that still holds us captive is our inability to forgive.
Do you know people -- maybe who aren't even alive anymore -- that you haven't been able to forgive? Are there certain events in your life you just can't release? You should know by now that what you can't release isn't the person or the condition that you see as being the source of your pain. What seems to be "stuck" isn't an old situation you can't release; it's a thought.
Forgiveness for others becomes possible when we’ve held our own being with great compassion. This short talk and guided meditation brings forth our most awake and tender presence as we ask for forgiveness, offer care to the woundedness within us, and then extend forgiveness to another who has hurt us. (from the Spring 2018 IMCW 7-day Silent Retreat)
Join Tara in a 10-day online course on forgiveness available through Insight Timer: Free Yourself From Blame & Resentment.