It's easy to forget that we are all perfect in our own design. Sometimes we muck it up with habits and choices that do not serve us. 

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How to Say “No” More and Focus on What Actually Matters

woman-obscured-by-adhesive-notes-holds-out-message-saying-no-picture-id181049594 “No” as a Tool for Success

Have you ever felt like everyone around you wants a piece of you? Learning how to say “no” to these people will allow you time to focus on yourself, and your own priorities.

That’s why today I want you to make the commitment to saying “no” more often – and I will teach you how to easily and effectively communicate this to those around you.

We’ve All Been There

Suppose your kids want you to drive them everywhere or they want to borrow the car, screwing up your own plans for the day.

Or your coworkers want your help on projects that aren’t really your responsibility.

Maybe your boss wants you to work overtime to finish a report you could have completed days ago if he had just given you the information you needed when you needed it.

Your sister asks you to take her kids for the weekend. Your mother wants you to come over and take her shopping.

It feels like you never get a moment to yourself to focus on what YOU want to do!

So how do you combat all the demands on your time and energy? Especially when it’s so easy for people to reach you at any time, no matter where you are, by phone, text, instant messaging, facetime, email, social media, or video chat?

It’s simple: you learn how to say “no.”

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199 Hits

Love At The Deepest Level

love-at-deepest-level Returning to Peace

You are a blessing on this Earth. You are a miracle. You as you are right now, regardless of how you have lived your life, are loved completely and totally by God. You, in the moment, are complete.

The reason why you have struggled to access that state of being on a consistent basis is because you, in some way shape or form, have been led to believe that you, as you are, isn’t enough. 

I want you to remember the truth we see and experience is love at the deepest level. This whole play, the whole thing, the people you speak to, the people that you don’t speak to, the people that are in the background, the people that are in the foreground, every life experience, every circumstance in every situation is love. That means that in this moment, YOU ARE LOVED! It’s time to engage in every activity with a smile on your face and with love in your heart. The individual who can do that is free of the illusion. 

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592 Hits

Transmuting Fear

sun-shining-over-the-earth-from-space-picture-id1152439371 Love is the only answer.

You’ve heard that before. Love is the only answer. It is the answer.

So today what we’re really going to talk about is love. Fear is the focus so many people have had lately … it is the fear of _____  … and then just fill in the blank of whatever the fear has been.

But what I want to talk about is Love.

Yes, the energy of the world is swirling in the fear, and the anger, and the overwhelm, and the lack of knowing what to choose, and what to do, and what not to do, and the judgment, and the criticism.

Have you seen any of that at all, by chance?

The reality of it is that, yes, there are a lot of people that are in that place … and that is a really unhealthy place to be because it just perpetuates the negativity. It just perpetuates the fear. It just perpetuates the anger, the judgment, the criticism. And what we know about judgment and criticism and anger and pain and hate, and all those things, is that if you are projecting it outward, there’s something inward. There’s something that you are avoiding, don’t like, are angry with, are judgmental, or critical of within yourself. And we look to other people and we put the blame on them. It isn’t always the same thing, but there’s a lot of projecting that’s happening.

And now more than ever we need to re-visit what we are DOING to shift that.

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177 Hits

How To Deal With Haters

How To Deal With Haters How To Deal With Haters
You will always have some haters. In fact, I believe if you have some haters, you're probably doing something great.” — Kute Blackson


You will always have haters in your life, your haters are people who gossip about you, talk negatively about you, hate on you for some reason. You will always have some haters in your life. It’s inevitable. It’s life. In this episode, I share a simple practice and ideas to learn how to deal with other people's hatred towards you. If you really want to be free, you must make peace with yourself and know you will not be able to please everyone. No matter what you do, you will have people who do not like you and will talk about you. Listen to this important episode and learn how to be at peace within yourself, so that you can be freer in the world.

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229 Hits

Sometimes It's About The Questions, Not The Answers!

empty-swing-at-the-park-picture-id1213877125 Sometimes It's About The Questions, Not The Answers!

It is so natural to want concrete answers in life. Back when I was making my living doing private readings, that’s what most people came to me for: Directions, guidance, and ANSWERS. “Will so-and-so ask me to marry him? How will this business deal work out? When is my kid/mom/uncle/partner ever gonna straighten out their life??, When is he coming back?”

Boy, do I understand. Especially with so much uncertainty these days, everyone wants to know: “When will coronavirus get under control? Should I quit my job? Is my relationship with so-and-so gonna last when we can’t see each other?”

As humans, we have a natural desire for certainty. But that desire often handcuffs us, keeping us locked into a single way of seeing the world. There is so much more that Spirit has in store for us, but we can’t see it because we are so tied to our reality. 

That’s why before we can talk about getting answers, we have to talk about asking the right questions. 

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342 Hits

Do your actions inspire others?

dreaming-of-flying-picture-id936435326 Do your actions inspire others?

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more; you are a leader.” 

—John Quincy Adams, America’s sixth president and author of the Monroe Doctrine 


America was founded on the willingness of everyday people to stand up for what they believe and inspire others to do the same. It is the single, most breathtaking aspect of humanity that, in times of great turmoil and strife, simple individuals step up and become something awesome to behold—they become expressions of the Divine.

It is in this convergence of spiritual people becoming active and active people becoming spiritual that the hope of humanity now rests.

If you want to See the Change, Be the Change.

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218 Hits

Meeting Racism, Homophobia and Close-Mindedness With Love and Compassion

our-style-is-influenced-by-our-upbringing-picture-id1179747953 Meeting Racism, Homophobia and Close-Mindedness With Love and Compassion

Hate, negativity, close-mindedness — none of this is new. Being heavily tattooed with big holes in my earlobes, a skateboarder and a fan of punk/hardcore music since my teenage years has left me all too familiar with judgmental people, especially growing up in a small town before these things started to become somewhat socially acceptable.

Disapproving looks, comments under the breath, or, in some cases, blatantly to my face, have been commonplace throughout my life and have led me time and again to contemplate why people feel the need, or, that they have the right to cast judgments and write someone off based solely on outer appearances or personal lifestyle choices.

There’s really no simple answer. Each person is a unique individual with a unique set of circumstances that has led them to become the person that they are today. One thing I’ve learned about myself however, and my own judgments (because yes, I too am human and have no shortage of them), is that they’re almost always rooted in fear.

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288 Hits

Share The Calm, Dampen The Panic

calmlandsape Share The Calm, Dampen The Panic

In order to combat the Fear Virus and negativity that can be so prevalent, I’ve been making it a practice to think about positive aspects of our current situation. Not to downplay the very real struggles that people are having, but in order to put myself in a space where I can bring my best to those around me. 

One of the things that I’ve been thinking about is how we’re now using tools like technology in new ways. I just read this article in Wired magazine about this very thing. The global challenges we’re all facing have forced us out of “life as ordinary” and made us find new ways of being, including new ways of communing. 

And that’s exactly what the founders of the Internet had envisioned: The idealism that we could use this extraordinary tool for positive social connection, for support, for enhancing each other’s lives. Isn’t that so much better than just using it to have political flame wars on Twitter? (Don’t get me started on Twitter…!) More and more of us are now using these tools to build something positive, something helpful, something uplifting. 

This time has also helped me personally evaluate the role I want technology to play in my life. I can’t just say, “I’m not going to go online.” It’s an essential part of our lives, especially right now. While we can’t spend all day online — that’s just not healthy! — we can be very intentional about what we choose to allow into our environment. For instance, I have no tolerance now for negativity. None. My goal is to create a collective community where everyone feels safe and supported, and that is positive and meaningful. 

That doesn’t mean we don’t make space for people who are hurting and are scared. You are so welcome here. I’m sending you a huge virtual hug. I want you to know that you are not alone. 

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267 Hits

Shaking is Meant for Shifting

concerned-healthcare-worker-looking-through-a-window-picture-id1215311167 Shaking is Meant for Shifting

For me and many of the people I’ve spoken to who are part of the stay-at-home population, it feels like one day is rolling right into the next with not that much changing in any given 24-hour period.

Of course, if we’re working from home or home-schooling our children or are caregivers for our loved ones, the details of each day are numerous and ever-changing.

But it’s the general tone of the day that I’m speaking about... 

I’m wondering about that question mark that’s hanging over the planet.

What is this shaking up of the world as we know it ushering in? 

What will our personal and collective lives look like in a few months…

And in a few years?

Though there have been a few other pandemics over the last hundred years or so, never before have we experienced the repercussions of a pandemic like the one enfolding the whole of the planet today. 

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329 Hits

Tips to Create & Maintain Healthy Mental Health Habits Vital during COVID-19

homeoffice Tips to Create & Maintain Healthy Mental Health Habits Vital during COVID-19

With the recent mandates to maintain social isolation, people are more stressed than ever before. Anxiety and panic are plaguing people who have previously managed stress with ease. Marriages that were stressed are now straining under the weight of so much “togetherness”. Professionals are trying to find ways to manage a new normal as they work to create workspaces in their homes, sometimes with kids around. Parents are trying to tackle the rigors of homeschooling. People living on their own are feeling isolated and lonely.

Being under stay-at-home orders provides an opportunity to focus on embracing simple disciplines that can change our health and happiness for the long haul. Refuse to get stuck in the traps of social distancing: staying up late, consuming too much food, alcohol, television and social media, sleeping in, and letting the day go by without a structured plan or schedule. By throwing all discipline out the window in a stressful time, you lose a unique opportunity to trade unhealthy habits for healthy ones that could change the trajectory of your life for the better.

By adopting healthy coping skills, people can find greater contentment and peace. Creating and implementing new schedules or sticking to familiar routines can give people a sense of stability and security, thus reducing anxiety. Finding ways to connect with others in meaningful ways electronically can reduce feelings of isolation and loneliness, thus reducing depression symptoms. Practicing mindfulness can lead us to feeling grateful and encourage greater levels of happiness.

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805 Hits

A New Fearless Self: Living The Life Of Joy & Freedom

fearless_self A New Fearless Self: Living The Life Of Joy & Freedom
Stress is building up everyday. In the days of the Pandemic, when the entire Globe has come together in terms of their own existence, when individuality has stopped having a meaning, when people have come to understand that, now all their petty issues have submerged into the common pool of human existence.

Life itself is the only issue that has meaning, all else comes later. Humanity has come to understand that only when there is life, only then the concept of issues has a meaning and relevance.

FEAR RULES THE HEARTS

With the influx of messages from the media, fear is looming large in the lives of most people. In the average man, who has been conditioned to believe that his life revolves around making money. He is at a loss on how to do his daily activity amidst the current environment.
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346 Hits

Emotional Intelligence: Escaping the Matrix of Fear

Emotional Intelligence: Escaping the Matrix of Fear Emotional Intelligence: Escaping the Matrix of Fear

For many young people, the COVID virus outbreak will bring their first experience of fear and anxiety as a pervasive mood. As a society we are afraid of fear, and most of the time we can turn our backs on it. But this kind of denial is unworkable in a crisis. As bad news mounts daily and society becomes ever more anxious, countless people become enmeshed in the matrix of fear without knowing how to escape.

Social forces can drive you to participate in the matrix of fear, but society cannot get you out of it. Escape is something each person must confront on their own. I believe that freeing yourself from fear and anxiety is possible. More than that, you can learn how to be free of fear long after the COVID crisis has passed.

The key is to cultivate emotional intelligence. The term had a burst of attention some years ago, but the value of emotional intelligence never changes, and when you focus on it, you will achieve something worthwhile for life.  Here are six principles to guide you through the process.

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547 Hits

Be Home

home Be Home

What’s your deepest nature?

The Practice:
Be home.

Why?

Throughout history, people have wondered about human nature. Deep down, are we basically good or bad?

When the body is not disturbed by hunger, thirst, pain, or illness, and when the mind is not disturbed by threat, frustration, or rejection, then most people settle into their resting state. This is a sustainable equilibrium in which the body refuels and repairs itself and the mind feels peaceful, happy, and loving. I call this the Responsive mode. In a sense, this is our “home base,” our fundamental nature as human beings. (Obviously, I am not talking about the physical location where a person lives.) We are still engaged with the world, still participating with pleasure and passion, but on the basis of a background sense of safety, sufficiency, and connection.

But when body or mind are disturbed – perhaps by overwork and fatigue, or by the cough of a nearby lion a million years ago or a frown across a dinner table today – Mother Nature has endowed us with hair-trigger mechanisms that drive us from our resting state. Fight-flight-freeze systems in the body get activated, and related experiences of fear and anger, disappointment and drivenness, and loneliness, shame, and spite occur in the mind.

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461 Hits

Find Your Voice

motherdaugher Find Your Voice

This week I noticed a theme that I picked up on during conversations with various people I thought I’d bring to you. I noticed there was a recurring discussion about speaking the truth, using your voice in a powerful way, and dealing with the consequences of what happens when you don’t speak out of fear.

Authenticity requires you to use your voice with a certain veracity– telling the truth, the absolute truth. Finding your voice takes courage, especially if you were raised to be seen and not heard, or you had to fight to be heard, or you were punished for telling the truth. Maybe all these things were implied while you were learning how to fit in, before finding out who you wanted to be.

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436 Hits

Transformation Is Possible - It Is Already Here

transformation Transformation Is Possible - It Is Already Here

The one thing in life that never changes is change, or so people say. But in reality we all experience a struggle between accepting change and resisting it, trying to make things different and yet feeling an anxious need to keep things the same. This struggle is what makes personal change so difficult. We can’t make up our minds once and for all how we feel about changing.

 

If change is so difficult, how can there be personal transformation, upon which the whole movement of human potential is based?  It takes vision and commitment to believe that such a thing is even possible. Most people have mixed feelings about how their lives are going. “Taking the bitter with the sweet” is an old saying in English dating back to the 13th century, but it expresses a universal experience in every society.

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574 Hits

Take The Streets! The Success Of Global Protests

protest Take The Streets! The Success Of Global Protests

I’m in Colombia on my annual trip to the Kogi and will be in Guatemala in January with a group to visit the Mayan shamans and their sacred sites. I’m struck by the magnitude of popular demonstrations in Latin America. I’m also impressed by the millions of people around the planet who are taking their grievances into the streets. 

Half of the Latin American countries have experienced large-scale demonstrations – mostly peaceful – during the last few months. Protest movements also are sweeping nations as diverse as France and Iraq, Sweden and Lebanon, Iran and Hong Kong. 

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379 Hits

Light Your Sexual Fire in 2020

Light Your Sexual Fire in 2020 Light Your Sexual Fire in 2020

When you think about your intentions for 2020, is sexuality on the list?

Do you honor your sexuality as vital to your health, happiness, and life purpose? 

Many people think of sexuality as insignificant and separate from the rest of their lives. Some put sex (or solo self-pleasure) last on their to-do list. Others forget about it completely.

Sexuality is far more than what happens in the bedroom (or occasionally on the kitchen counter).  

Your sexuality impacts every aspect of your life, including your career, money flow, health, and spirituality. Honoring your sexuality can drastically improve your life in 2020.

My journey has been living proof that sexuality matters. Before I honored my sexuality, I was a workaholic who smiled on the outside yet secretly struggled with an eating disorder, severe self-doubt, and health issues. I was sad, single, sick, and stressed.

Embracing my sexuality helped me heal and create the life I wanted. With the help of my sexual energy, I healed long-standing health issues, manifested the romantic relationship of my dreams, transformed body image issues into body confidence, and created a thriving business that I love. And best of all, I now feel confident, happy, and free.

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933 Hits

How to Bring the Love Sooner

How to Bring the Love Sooner How to Bring the Love Sooner

We all know what it feels like when we go into a new experience. A gathering of people we don’t know, some kind of new job that we’re employed in, or some kind of social situation where we don’t know the people, we don’t know the circumstances, et cetera. There is a sense of tension in the body because we don’t know how we’re going to be received. We’re afraid we won’t know what to talk about or we’re not sure that we’re going to be liked by others. We’re not sure that we’re going to be able to relate to the other people or be able to shine in the situation the way that we know we can.

Creating a Story

When the mind is in an uncertain place, it starts to rattle, and it starts to look everywhere for something to lock in on to feel more secure. When this happens the mind has a tendency to go into stories and judgments. It may judge the other people in the situation, or it will start to judge the self. It does this all in the attempt for the mind to have something upon which to focus.

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1058 Hits

How To Stop Caring What Other People Think About You

group-of-hands-with-pointing-finger-picture-id174850257 How To Stop Caring What Other People Think About You

You have no control of what other people think about you.

The only control that you have is over yourself, and how you respond.

Your responsibility is not to make others happy but to be yourself fully.

People’s opinions of you reflect more about themselves than about you. So don’t take it personally. Just because they judge you a certain way, or have a negative opinion of you, doesn’t mean it’s true.

It’s just their opinion. It’s their perception, and perception is not reality.

Our perception is a projection based on our current level of consciousness which is determined by our conditioning and experiences.

So make peace with who you are, and who you aren’t. The more you love and accept yourself, the less you will seek it from others.

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1658 Hits

Be your SELF not your selfie: The reality about our story on social media

taking-a-selfie-picture-id898834578 Be your SELF not your selfie: The reality about our story on social media

How many of you have taken a selfie? If you have, raise your hand. Okay, I can’t really see you raising your hand but I’m pretty sure most people had taken many selfies. In fact, in the past I took many selfies even before they were called selfies using my camera’s self-timer (yeah millennials, go ahead and laugh), all because of Facebook. That was around 2007 before it exploded to having more than 2 billion daily users. It was back on the day when updating your status was still done in the third person and the newsfeed was called the Wall. These days, even my 68-year old mother takes selfies to post on Facebook. So yeah, we all have done it.

 All these years, I’ve had a love-hate relationship with social media. I’ve deactivated my accounts many times in the past and stayed offline for years. The superficiality of it all really bugged me. I am the type of person who would rather have a handful of close friends instead of a big circle. But the person who introduced me to Facebook is the type of person who “collects” friends because, as she puts it, “You’ll never know when you need them.”

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704 Hits