It's easy to forget that we are all perfect in our own design. Sometimes we muck it up with habits and choices that do not serve us. 

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Surrendering To The Light Of Conscious Awareness

1130925494758316.8Ofdq6UYGMbFyPQbQCUS_height640 3 STEPS TO INCREASED SELF LOVE

Self love can be a tricky thing. All too often, we confuse self preservation with love. We feel that we love ourselves because we make the effort to exercise, eat right, and get enough sleep. While these things are certainly necessary to physical well-being, they can become unreliable substitutes for an honest and deeply based sense of love and caring for oneself. So, if you find yourself looking to others for love and approval, here are three steps that you can take to increase your level of self love. Remember, while you may be loved by others, the primary source of all the love in your life begins with you.

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3 Keys To Emotional Independence

emotionalindependence 3 Keys To Emotional Independence

Happy Independence Day - the day we celebrate our “unalienable rights” to life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness, and freedom! Now of course there are many ways to achieve living life to the fullest, feeling liberated, and attaining happiness, but I can promise you that if you truly want to let freedom ring, then you must foster emotional independence.   Emotional independence is being able to stand in your power, and to make choices based on what is in your highest versus as a reaction to external circumstances. And the crazy thing is, that even though “unalienable rights” are defined as those that cannot be surrendered, transferred, given away to, or revoked by another, the fact is that most of us give away our power when it comes to emotional independence and let outside sources rob of us our joy, equilibrium, internal knowing, and sense of self.

So, if your day, mood, or reactions are being controlled by: 

  • the way your butt and thighs look in your jeans,
  • whether a person you are dating asks you out for Saturday night or texts you the day after you slept together,
  • a disagreement you’ve had with a family member,
  • someone else’s opinion of you, or
  • your desire to numb out and avoid dealing with certain situations,

then chances are you need some support in fostering emotional independence.




Here are 3 tips to aid you on your path to true freedom.

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610 Hits

Love, Attraction, & Gray Hair!

grayhairlove Love, Attraction, & Gray Hair!

Gray hair getting you down?

Here’s some science based good news!

Whether you are dating or partnered, according to a joint study between psychologists from the University of St. Andrews and the University of Liverpool, a more mature appearance is exactly what some men find the most attractive. (“Mature” is code for gray hair in this instance.)

The study looked at how likely men (and women) are to be attracted to certain hair and eye color in their chosen partners, and they found that for men, the best indicator of preferences was the hair and eye color of their mothers. When nearly 700 volunteer participants (including 394 men) were asked about the hair and eye color of themselves, their parents, and their partners, they found that overwhelmingly, men were attracted to the same coloring that their mothers had.

The study found that “healthy” hair is more important than hair color unless you have an unnatural color in your hair, in which case it works against you.

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7 Ways To Overcome Feeling Insecure In A Relationship and Be Free

youll-step-on-each-others-toes-picture-id1019384968 7 Ways To Overcome Feeling Insecure In A Relationship and Be Free
“Your relationship with yourself is the real foundation for your relationship with others.”

The partner you attract in a relationship is a mirror manifestation of yourself. When you don’t have a good relationship with yourself, you look to your partner to give you a sense of validation. This leads to feelings of insecurity and suffering. Listen to this episode to learn 7 simple, yet powerful keys to improve your relationship with yourself and overcome feelings of insecurity.

Some Questions I Ask:

  • How often do you really connect with who you are?
  • Have you ever felt insecure in your relationship?
  • Do you like the partners you are attracting into your sphere?
  • How do you deal with the fear of losing your identity in your relationship?
  • How often do you look in the mirror? Do you like what you see?
  • Have you noticed the voice in your head that criticizes you?
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1026 Hits

Set Yourself Free with Love and Forgiveness

happy-mature-woman-studio-portrait-full-length-sitting-arms-extended-picture-id1128997751 Set Yourself Free with Love and Forgiveness

The overall theme that the cards reveal this week in the Weekly Oracle Card Guidance and Lesson is forgiveness. Who or what do you need to forgive?

I know forgiveness may seem like one of those intangible ideals that’s just out of reach or a waste of time. But, it’s not. You can make the choice to forgive. And by taking that decision, you not only move forward on your path, but you also open the door to Spirit’s messages.

Resentment, anger, shame, and regret all keep you focused on the past and block you from accessing the realm of connection. In addition to robbing you of the present, lack of forgiveness feeds your ego mind, your Goblin, and keeps you in a “Me Bubble.” Forgiveness is one of the greatest keys to strengthening your intuition and making positive changes in your life.

I would not be where I am today if it weren’t for forgiveness. After years of abusive relationships, drinking, and trying to numb my pain, I had a spiritual epiphany in which I realized that I had to forgive if I wanted to move forward. Through giving up the need to be hurt and to hate, I’ve been able to finally have the amazing, healthy relationship I’d always wanted. 

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New Questions That Lead to Self-Wholeness

selfwholeness New Questions That Lead to Self-Wholeness

Our stressful, pain-filled experiences are not caused by people or events but by our reactions to them. And yet, if we will honestly examine the way we presently question our defeats, here’s what we see: we are still desperately seeking answers that serve only to correct the surface or exterior conditions. We are still blaming circumstances for crushing us. The direction of our questions proves that we are still thinking incorrectly about our problems.

This is supremely important to grasp if we wish to change our inner and outer world. By their very nature, our old questions tend to make and then keep us victims. They imply that someone or something outside of ourselves is punishing us. No human being is a victim of any punishment outside of their own undeveloped life-level from which their inner reactions are seen as outer attacks. This is why we must learn to turn our questions into tools for developing self-wholeness instead of letting them lead us off in the wrong direction.

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988 Hits

Getting Off the Karmic Cartwheel and Back Into Love...

karmic-pattern1 Getting Off the Karmic Cartwheel and Back Into Love...

Yes, there is such a thing as being stuck in a karmic pattern that no longer serves you.

These patterns are the result of unconscious programs that trigger false beliefs and perpetuate stories that age, weaken and diminish life…

and, blocks your ability to know the truth.  

You are a perfect divine being whose essence is LOVE!

Having worked with thousands of people worldwide, we’ve discovered universal thought processes running through humanity.

“I don't deserve love!” “No one will ever love me!” “Love is dangerous”

These programs have been locked in your DNA and effect the way your genes express. In other words, your thoughts control your energetic frequency and that frequency either repels love or is a magnet to love.

You might not think this is relevant to you, however, the sneaky unconscious mind stores past events, emotions and decisions that surface as negative life patterns.

How do you know if you are on this karmic merry go round blocking love? 

Look at how much love you’ve allowed into your life. That will tell you whether or not you are free to love yourself, your family, friends, your beloved and God.

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638 Hits

5 Ways To Heal Your Heart

healingheart 5 Ways To Heal Your Heart

The relationships we have with others – romantic or platonic – are one of the most sacred aspects of our being. In these close, intimate spaces, we are allowed to become a part of someone else’s life, offering them love and affection, advice and caring, nurturing and a listening ear.

But there are times when these relationships dissolve – for myriad reasons – and the heartache that results can be one of the most painful things to endure. Heartache can turn us into people we’d rather not be. To avoid this, I offer you these 5 ways to heal your heart, and return to love.

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4 Ways To Deal With Regret and Eliminate It

regrets 4 Ways To Deal With Regret and Eliminate It

Regret is a killer.

It robs you of your peace in the moment and limits your ability to create a fresh future.

Regret is that feeling when you look back from your future and wish you had done it differently.

We have all done things that we felt bad about and judged ourselves for from the past.

Whether it was:

Bad relationship choices.

The way you handled a break up.

Unwise financial decisions.

What are you still judging yourself for?

What regrets do you still have?

Maybe you have been holding yourself hostage, thinking you are a bad person or that God is judging you?

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809 Hits

Love Yourself Most

loveyourself Love Yourself Most

My amazing friend, Sheri Salata, is a deep, loving, soulful woman who had the career of her dreams for 21 years including titles as Executive Producer of the Oprah Show and co-CEO of OWN network. When she decided to move on and “produce” her own life she was one hundred pounds overweight, no man in site, and nearly 57 years old. Today her book, The Beautiful No, arrives in stores, and I’ve invited her to be a guest blogger on the topic of

What I Know About Love.

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Do You Judge Your Feelings? Here is What to Do Instead

judgingoneself Do You Judge Your Feelings? Here is What to Do Instead
Judgments can block the vital information your feelings offer you, preventing the release of stress or pain that expression of some feelings provides.

Did you grow up being taught that feeling and expressing your feelings is wrong or bad – especially your painful feelings?

I often have the experience with my clients of hearing them apologize when they start to cry. “I’m so sorry that I’m getting emotional,” they often say to me.

“It’s okay to cry,” I tell them. “Crying is a natural way of expressing feelings and releasing pain.” When they are trying to be very quiet about it, I often say, “It’s okay to cry out loud and allow yourself to make noise.”

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734 Hits

4 Ways To Be Good To Yourself

Begoodtoyourself 4 Ways To Be Good To Yourself

Self-care and self-love are necessary parts of a happy, healthy, and balanced life. So often, we find ourselves taking care of everyone else, attending to their needs while ignoring our own. Whether it is a matter of time and energy constraints, self-esteem issues, or deep-seated feelings about our worth in the world, being good to yourself is something that we all deserve and are worthy of.

Summertime gives us myriad opportunities for self-care. The sun simply feels divine. Summertime treats such as a simple popsicle can offer a much-needed boost in mood. And the opportunity to be around friends, neighbors, and loved ones outside at a campfire or an outdoor party breathe new life into our daily existence.

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900 Hits

Love Someone

senior-couple-embrace-in-kitchen-picture-id498746836 Love Someone

What can you do when there’s nothing you can do?

The Practice:
Love Someone.
Why?

Sometimes something happens. Perhaps your sweet old cat takes a turn for the worse, or there’s a money problem, or your son waves goodbye as he gets on a plane to start college on the other side of the country. Sometimes it’s on a larger scale: maybe there’s been an election and you’re grappling with its consequences (see my last post on this topic: Take Heart).

Or you might be dealing with something ongoing, like a dead-end job (or no job at all), life after divorce, chronic pain, or a teenager who won’t talk to you.

Whatever it is, at first it’s normal to feel rattled, frozen, or unclear about what to do. After awhile, you do what you can to change things for the better. But often there’s not much you can actually change, and sometimes nothing at all.

Still, there is always one thing you can do, no matter what.

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519 Hits

Take Heart

hand-holding-red-knit-heart-picture-id1147909478 Take Heart

What do you do when the bottom falls out?

The Practice:
Take heart.

Why?

It takes heart to live in even ordinary times.

By “taking heart,” I mean several related things:

  • Sensing your heart and chest
  • Finding encouragement in what is good both around you and inside you
  • Resting in your own warmth, compassion, and kindness; resting in the caring for you from others; love flowing in and love flowing out
  • Being courageous, whole-hearted and strong-hearted – going forward wisely even when anxious, knowing your own truth and as you speak it

When you take heart, you’re more able to deal with challenges like aging, illness, trauma, or conflicts with others. You’re also more able to take advantage of opportunities with confidence and grit.

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505 Hits

Getting Everything by Giving It

loving-the-planet-picture-id155443554 Getting Everything by Giving It

The world is not holding you back. You are holding the world back. You are holding back your strength and your strength can make a difference at this time. You have a power in you that can move mountains, and, better yet, people. But you’re still allowing others to tell you what’s possible or right.

Maybe you’re still chasing kudos to glue some sequined wings onto your hobbled back. But no amount of approval will ever set loose the inspired potential that you already possess. You have the power to shed your ordinary skin. You have the power to turn pain into hope, disconnection into union, and this moment into a balm to some section of humanity. You are holding back the floodgates of your own wild ride.

Wild success is not about what the world can give to you, but what you can give to the world.

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1047 Hits

From Anti-Aging to Eternal Being: Embracing the Sage

aginggrace From Anti-Aging to Eternal Being: Embracing the Sage

Aging is a natural process occurring for each of us, although it’s one we’ve been taught to resist. With the numerous serums, health products and procedures promising to help win the battle against aging, many are caught up in this constant “fight” against aging and left desperately looking for the next miracle product to stop or even reverse the natural effects of time’s passing. In fact, so pervasive is this growing resistance to the aging process that, according to Orbis Research, “the global anti-aging market is estimated to reach $331.41 billion by 2021.”

The fact is, there is no miracle product or serum. Aging is going to happen, but it doesn’t have to be a struggle. When it comes to our views on aging, there is a deeper truth we can embrace, and one which would benefit us greatly as a society.

Currently, our culture places our value on external appearances. We obsess about how we’re perceived, how we get ahead by the way people perceive us, if we’re going to be respected, or if we’re going to get the attention that we need, etc. It’s a focus that leaves us constantly looking for validation and our worth from the outside in.

However, in a time not too long ago, there was more value placed on the internal aspect of our life. The wise old sage was the most coveted individual in the tribe. He or she was the leader of the people, the most respected, and the one whom everyone looked to for guidance.

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861 Hits

The Fastest Path to Loving Yourself More

love-everything-picture-id1135940061 The Fastest Path to Loving Yourself More

Unless you are in a dark place of self-loathing (in which case please find a professional counselor to help you work through it), I know that the fastest way to love yourself more is to be in a healthy, happy, love relationship.

I have come across so many people who tell me that they are “working” on loving themselves, and once they do THEN, they will begin dating.”

I believe you can do both at the same time.

The good news is that working on yourself is a great thing and you can find strategies to be more loving and kind and accepting of yourself and you need to know that the critical voice in your head can be lessened but folks, honestly, you’re never going to eliminate it entirely.

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It’s Impossible to Create a Bad Life, If You’re Good to Yourself

selflove It’s Impossible to Create a Bad Life, If You’re Good to Yourself

As a career and success coach, I hear my fair share of wanting to bulldoze through change, especially when life seems to throb like a toothache, turn into the life you never thought you’d have, or slow to a crawl through the rubbery land of powerlessness.   

Everybody wants to rush through transition like it’s a bad root canal.  But transition is a threshold. It’s a sacred life appointment—the crossing from one world to another. You will reclaim yourself here, be infused with messages you could receive no other way. This is not just positive mumbo jumbo. I am describing to you a possibility that exists for you, right now, right here, and will not come again, at least, not in this way.

I know, maybe, you’d still rather the root canal.

It’s natural to feel this way. Sometimes, growth can make us feel helpless.

When life becomes uncomfortable, we are being invited to explore our own personal power and dormant capacities. We have the opportunity to turn “scared” into “sacred” and experience a universe of expansion instead of contraction. But it’s up to us. It’s a choice. It’s the opportunity of a lifetime. But only if we consciously choose for it to be that way.

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991 Hits

Soul Talk: Overcoming the Feeling of Jealousy

unhappy-businesswoman-with-male-colleague-being-congratulated-picture-id941420838 Soul Talk: Overcoming the Feeling of Jealousy

“The more you can celebrate and bless the success of those around you, the more you open yourself to receive blessings in your life.”

Jealousy is that tight feeling that arises when you focus on what you aren’t rather that who you are. As human beings, we have all felt jealous at some point in our lives. It makes your energy contract and only leads to suffering. Listen to this episode and learn 3 keys to move past your jealousy and focus on your amazingness.

In This Episode You Will Learn:

  • 3 keys to overcome the feeling of jealousy.
  • Why we sometimes feel jealous of others.
  • How comparing yourself to others changes your energy.
  • Why scarcity is an illusion.
  • Why celebrating the success of others is good for you.
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772 Hits

You Are Not Your Shame

woman-depressed-and-alone-picture-id680693460 You Are Not Your Shame

Whenever I have the privilege of leading transformational workshops, I am always in awe of what an honor it is to be invited into people’s lives and have them share so openly about their past as well as the honest and raw feelings they have about themselves and their lives. I expect to feel the same sense of awe and privilege at my upcoming workshop ‘The Body Shadow: From Self-Loathing to Self-Loving’ hosted by Omega in June 2019. Of course, we are also seeing so much of this in today’s culture – people, especially women, coming forward and sharing about the assaults, attacks, abuse, and secrets that they have not wanted, been able, or felt ready to share.



Although I am always very mindful of never assuming I know or can even comprehend what someone else feels, since I never want to diminish someone else’s pain by comparing or making sweeping assumptions or generalizations, I think it is fair to say that most of us have endured situations that felt off, wrong, or were just downright soul-crushing. And, in order to deal with or manage the pain or to just do what we need to do to get by and function, we learned to manage it, push it down, remain silent, numb ourselves, or stay busy and try to forget about it.

Although all of our stories are personal and unique, whether it comes from what we are seeing in the news, the #MeToo movement, how we feel about our bodies, or the stories I hear from the people I have the privilege of working with, I am always so present to the insidiousness of the shame we all carry.

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1418 Hits