I started my new year with the commitment to forgive everyone in my life and drop all the "baggage" that I have carried for all my life. As January 1st was a full moon day, I decided to do a full moon forgiveness meditation as per my spiritual teacher's teachings. My intention resulted in many emotional roller coaster rides throughout the day complete with numerous instances of being triggered. I was very angry and impatient with my son for not getting ready on time, and then later on, I was angry and resentful at myself for my behavior. That evening, in presence of the beautiful full moon I started my full moon forgiveness meditation with four mantras to help me with my intention.
1. I love myself and everyone unconditionally.
2. I accept myself just the way I am and I accept everyone just the way they are.
3. I forgive myself and everyone easily.
4. I am grateful for myself and everyone's contributions in my life.
The next morning, I woke up again to the beautiful full moon –the first sight from my bedroom window. I felt that this was the sign that my forgiveness meditation was successful and I had dropped all my baggage.
On my drive to work, I was guided coincidently to listen to Panache Desai's Grace online immersion about forgiveness. According to Panache, there is nothing to forgive, because everything is unfolding in Divine order. Instead of forgiving, it is important to feel everything that is arising and respond, instead of react. It is not about forgiving others, but forgiving ourselves for our immature and unconscious reactions to others in the past. All we need to do is to meet ourselves with compassion, as we did the best we could with the awareness we had at that time.