I've Been Thinking...

Over the last week, I wrote this essay several different times in several different ways. None of them felt quite right.

One essay felt too angry. Another felt too pollyannaish. One felt simplistic at a time when the world feels anything but. I’ve felt so many different emotions lately that it’s been hard to know what to think. At times I’ve felt like I’m living on an upside-down emotional rollercoaster as I watch the news unfold.

Then along came my youngest son who asked me to step away from the news and watch the new Pixar movie Soul with him. He and I watch all the Pixar films together. I even used to take him out of school to go to the theater when one came out, so of course I said sure. 

In hindsight, it felt like it was exactly the film I needed to see this week as I watched Americans debate the heart and soul of our country, while also preparing to inaugurate a man who ran on a platform to repair the soul of our nation.

When a society is deeply divided, a paradox is in force. On the one hand, people cry out for unity, while on the other hand, they keep on doing the very things that incite division. We are seeing this paradox grow stronger year by year in politics, but at bottom what we’re facing is a broken relationship. Society is a huge bundle of relationships, nothing more.

To stop being trapped in a paradox, you need a little practical psychology. The first step when a relationship falters, if you consider the situation psychologically, is to stop doing more of what didn’t work in the first place. The same holds true in a divided society.

As long as both sides engage in futile behavior, ending the divide between them isn’t going to happen. At a certain point a futile tactic turns into a fantasy. Here I’d define fantasy as a belief that runs contrary to reality. If you confront the realities of a situation but continue to ignore them, you are indulging in a fantasy.

Here are five fantasies that surround us right now. I’ll couch them in terms of a broken relationship.

A lot of people have felt they couldn’t breathe.”—Van Jones

Last November, when a new President and Vice President were elected in the U.S., many of us cried tears of relief. We felt we could breathe again, even if just for a moment. Not that the huge problems that face this country had been solved, but lighter, more compassionate voices were speaking at the national level. Possibility was appearing once again, where impossibility had ruled. Hope was arising within us, and the distant dream of a peaceful resolution of divisions seemed somehow closer. Now, in the wake of last week’s violent break-in at the Capitol building in Washington, it is even more important to hold onto that dream and to move forward in peace.

"Anyone can count the seeds in an apple, No one can count the apples in a seed."

Contemplating these words inspire me to not underestimate the potential of the coming year. We live in a world of infinite potential. Small actions with a sense of natural timing will grow fruitful results.

GOOD SEED
©1-18-13 Will Hale – Tadpole Parade

A new day dawns tomorrow
Once a seed is planted
It is up to God to make it grow

I have watered, fertilized
and trust the sun will rise

Planted but not forgotten
Left alone but not neglected
The process of life is out of my hands
Surrender is not giving up
It is letting go of control

Like the seed in the ground
It is my time to rest.
The tilling, planting, and praying
Is done
I can trust the spark of creation
To do what love does, Grow

Hi dear friend…..

I wanted to to take a few moments and wish you and your loved ones my love and prayers.

2020 was indeed a challenging year for us all. However, you are still standing! All the challenges that you faced simply prepared you for living your purpose ahead.

I wanted to personally thank you for all your support during this past year.

Whether you have been following my work for many years or are just finding about it now, I am deeply grateful for your being a part of it growing around the world, as well as sharing it with your friends and family.

It’s going to be very strange when we turn on our TVs on New Year’s Eve to watch the ball drop at Times Square. For the first time in 114 years, the streets of New York City will be empty. But as strange as that may seem—we still have good reason to celebrate!

Bottom line:

• We survived 2020.
• We made it this far!
• We pulled together, and tapped into resources we didn’t even think we had and above all, we moved forward.
• We learned how to do our jobs, teach our kids and order our essentials online.
• We figured out ways to maintain our fortitude and stay connected to our lives and our loved ones, even when wearing masks and keeping our distance.

I fully appreciate that not everyone was so fortunate and my heart and prayers go out to all those who have lost someone to Covid-19.

Over the years, I’ve spent some time learning how to practice persistence. Some of this has come with hard life lessons, and other valuable insights I’ve learned by watching the inspirational journeys of others.

The power of persistence is so important for achieving success in all aspects of our lives, so I want to make sure I share it with you.

One of my favorite quotes comes from Calvin Coolidge, who once said:

“Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.”

This quote is so powerful because it’s true. It doesn’t matter how much money you were born into, or how smart or talented you are. It doesn’t even matter how ambitious you are.

If you don’t have the necessary willpower and drive to keep moving forward to your goals no matter what roadblocks appear on your path, you will never unlock your true capacity for success.

So today I’d like to talk to you about the importance of persistence, and how your ability to persevere in the face of any obstacle is the key to your success in life.

Chasing perfection reminds me of a dog chasing his tale — you get dizzyingly exhausted trying to make it happen, but it’s always just out of reach. And if you do end up catching it, was it really worth it after all?

It’s easy to get caught up in chasing perfection, or the idea of a “perfect” life. It comes with the perfect income, the perfect house, the perfect family, the perfect body, and whatever “perfect” seems to be. But in reality, those who spend all their time and energy trying to make sure their lives are perfect are usually the unhappiest people I know.

So today I want to talk to you about the difference between chasing perfection and achieving happiness — how to create a life that truly brings you joy and fulfillment.  

My first mentor, W. Clement Stone, the author of “The Success System That Never Fails,” taught me many things, but one of the most important being able to ask for what you want.

He would repeatedly remind me, “If there is something to gain by asking and nothing to lose by asking, by all means ask.” This one principle has reaped great rewards in my life, and it can do the same for you.

That’s why today, I want to discuss the importance of asking for what you want in order to reach your full potential.

How to Ask For What You Want

Unfortunately, many of us are not great at asking for what we want. For any number of reasons stemming from childhood conditioning to traumatic rejections later in life, we have become afraid of the word “no.”

To be successful, you have to be willing to ask and keep asking for what you want until you get a “yes.”

Rejection is just part of the journey to finally getting to a “yes.” And it only takes one “yes” to radically change your life forever.

"When your mind and heart are truly open abundance will flow to you effortlessly and easily."

I have an emotional response to the following words that I don’t think is unique: loving, peaceful, forgiving, warm, tolerant, harmonious, heartfelt. To me, these words all have feminine overtones.  The same is true of the “A words” that are in circulation: appreciation, affection, acceptance, and allowing. If you are distressed by the deep divisions in society, these words seem to describe what has been lost.  They also outline a path to healing.

Does the feminine have a chance right now? Within every person resides two polarities, the masculine and the feminine. When both are free to express themselves, the foundation is laid for living in harmony, balance, and fulfilment. This need for wholeness is known to modern psychology as well as ancient spiritual wisdom. When we experience one polarity overshadowing the other, disharmony, imbalance, and inequality prevails.