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Best Ways To Be Your Biggest Cheerleader

bestway Best Ways To Be Your Biggest Cheerleader

They say we teach what we most need to learn and lately that has been true for me. I have decided to tackle a new project…I am calling it my “creative challenge,” and it is SO BIG and so intimidating to me that I am not sharing it with anyone… just yet.
Every day, as I carve out time to work on this project, I am confronted by a ton of thoughts of why I can’t do it, why it’s impossible, etc., and then I spend a bunch of time diving into my spiritual tool kit to off load the negative thinking. 

Needless to say, the project is moving at a snail’s pace.

It’s so easy to let the negative monkey mind chatter take over and I’ve had enough of it so here is my new commitment.

Today I am reminding myself of three very important things I seem to have forgotten:

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Is Self Love A Pre- Requisite To Soulmate Love?

selfloveheart Is Self Love A Pre- Requisite To Soulmate Love?

Self Love is the hot topic in the personal growth movement these days and when it comes to finding soulmate love, there are a lot of myths that until you love yourself first, you won’t be able to get anyone else to love you. Can this really be true?

My experience has been that most women and some men (at least in the Northern hemisphere) live with a negative, critical voice in their heads that is often filled with ugly, shaming thoughts, self-doubt, and brings with it feelings of never being “good enough.”

And, I began to wonder, do you really have to eliminate that persistent voice in order to find true love? Do we really need to be 100% in love with ourselves to experience Big Love?

I don’t think so.

What is required is to learn how to “talk back” to that voice and create strategies to love yourself more and better. This includes a big dose of self-awareness so that when the “voice surfaces” you kick its butt!

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228 Hits

What Are You Afraid Of?

afraidof What Are You Afraid Of?

The low frequency blocker to Love is fear.

Fear undermines love and thus your entire PLATINUM beingness.

Fear blocks love’s presence and fear happens when you don’t have trust.

When you’re in the high frequency state of love you’re in a truly expanded place and a state of acceptance.

You’re not afraid of anything, you’re just loving…hate and fear cannot exist in this state.

If you’re not in a state of love you have conscious or unconscious fearful thoughts blocking your ability to have and be the love that is your true essence.

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202 Hits

There is a cure for loneliness. And it’s….

friends-picture-id525695643 There is a cure for loneliness. And it’s….

YES, you guessed it - LOVE is the cure for loneliness.

There is so much loneliness in our world today.  Not only within our lives but on a global level, loneliness is fueled by fear, hatred and mis-trust.

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343 Hits

The Spirit of Giving

spiritofgiving The Spirit of Giving

For 11 months out of the year, we focus our energy on working, raising the kids, maintaining our relationships – both romantic and platonic, and trying to live as balanced a life as possible.

In the midst of juggling all of these responsibilities, we go through periods of neglecting and/or feeling neglected by our significant others; feeling under-appreciated by our immediate family; emotionally and physically distanced from our closest friends; disappointed with what’s going on at work; and disconnected with the most important person of all: ourselves.


Between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day, we find ourselves adding time, energy and money exponentially to all the people we didn’t get to spend as much time with as well as the ones who are the most important. We celebrate the season with countless holiday parties, grab bags and Secret Santa gifts. Ugly sweater parties and “catch up” drinks with friends we rarely get to see.

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How To Honor and Respect Yourself

woman-waving-rainbow-flag-at-gay-parade-picture-id972902056 How To Honor and Respect Yourself

Don’t mistake being kind, loving and spiritual for allowing others to walk all over you or treat you with disrespect.

When you know who you really are, a magnificent expression of the Divine, you won’t allow yourself to be treated like anything less.

Focus on your spirit and protect your true essence.

People treat you how you teach them to treat you based on what you accept.

No one can continue to mistreat you unless you allow it. You are responsible for what you accept. Allowing people to treat you with disrespect serves no one.

In life and relationships you get what you settle for.

So what are you settling for?

You can’t control people’s actions, but you can control what you put up with, accept and how you choose to respond.

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264 Hits

The Forgiveness Factor

happy-woman-jumping-and-enjoying-life-at-sunset-in-mountains-picture-id931873664 The Forgiveness Factor

Scientists have discovered there are emotional, mental, and even physical needs for forgiveness.

Every cell in your body acts like a computer. Each cell has an electromagnetic energy field and a biochemical composition that instantly responds to your environment — and to your thoughts.

According to well-documented discoveries in epigenetics, genetic inheritance is only a predisposition. Whether it is triggered or not is dependent on the individual’s programs.

What does that mean? It means that more than anything else, the body’s response to our conscious and unconscious thoughts determines your health and happiness.

Now, here’s the really good news!  To forgive is the soul’s choice.

That’s right, your soul has a choice!

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340 Hits

Start Each Morning With A Big Dose of LOVE

morning-and-new-obligations-picture-id923211752 Start Each Morning With A Big Dose of LOVE

Several years ago on a trip to Bali, we were privileged to meet a very old, wizened Shaman who taught us a beautiful morning love process to bless, heal, and nourish my body, mind, and soul.  

This transformative process is a fantastic way to begin each day and I highly recommend it for everyone who desires to have more love in their life!

Here’s how to do it:

When you wake up, before getting out of bed, before checking your phone, or anything else…  lie in bed, with your eyes closed. and put a smile on your face.

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How to Love Yourself & Make the World a Better Place in the Process

how-to-love-yourself-1024x683 How to Love Yourself & Make the World a Better Place in the Process

Have you ever wondered why we find it so easy to love other people yet find it so difficult learning how to love yourself?

I think it’s because we have been taught that loving ourselves is selfish or conceited in some way. After all, nobody likes a narcissistic person who walks around saying, “I’m so awesome!” all the time, and never seems to care very much about anyone else.  

But there is a huge difference between loving yourself and being a narcissist!

Loving yourself doesn’t mean you think you’re better than everyone else.

It’s simply a matter of recognizing your own good qualities and acknowledging that you are a loveable person and that you are worthy of love.

Because no matter what you’ve been taught to believe, you ARE worthy of love. I want you to understand that at a bone-deep level.

No matter who you are or where you’re at in life, you deserve all the love in the world.

And the most important person you need to receive that love from, more than anyone else, is yourself.

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You're so nice!

happy-kitten-likes-being-stroked-by-womans-hand-picture-id909106260 You're so nice!
"You're so nice!". I hear this phrase at least twice a day, and most of the time I don't mind and reply with the obligatory "Thank you.". Than there are the other times..the times where I do something "nice" that I really don't want to do. It's those times where I spew the words "yes, of course!" like a sweet venom. Sweet for the receiver but concealed with a dose of angst inside of myself about doing it.
 
I said "yes" to babysitting, and listened to a child whine over the amount of time it has taken me to get the Netflix show he want's on while contemplating why I chose this instead of getting my nails done. I have said "yes" to "loaning" money to distant friends while my gut told me that I would never see those precious dollars I had worked so hard for back. I have said "yes" to dinners with people that suck my energy dry and make me want to repeatedly bang my face into the dish of pasta I'm eating while wailing like a small child. Why? because I'm "nice".


 
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144 Hits

The Power of You

woman-from-behind-stretching-out-arms-by-sunrise-picture-id539331382 The Power of You
When you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt.” — Honore de Balzac

My friend Martha said something to me the other day that stopped me cold. “I have an idea for you,” she said. Having no idea what her idea could possibly be, I said, “Go for it. Tell me.”

Now, Martha knows me well. She knows my strengths, my weaknesses, my fears. She’s stood beside me when it was dark and she has constantly and consistently pushed me into my own light. When a person like that says they have an idea for you, pay attention.

Martha went on to tell me that a mutual friend who had recently been in a meeting with me remarked, “I didn’t know how smart Maria is. I didn’t realize who she was until that meeting. Why is she holding back her power?”

Ouch.

Martha continued, “Why don’t you take a week and walk into every encounter – personally and professionally – and say exactly what’s on your mind? Why don’t you take a week to feel your own personal power? Don’t be afraid that you might offend people. Don’t be afraid you might scare people. Don’t be afraid of your own intensity. Step into it and see how you feel.”


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184 Hits

How To Love Your Body (Video)

lovebody How To Love Your Body

Your body is beautiful just because you have a body.

No other reason needed.

It is a living work of art. A masterpiece and magical expression of the Divine.

But how often do we really appreciate and love our bodies?

We have been conditioned and brainwashed by the media to believe that “You are not enough as you are”.

This is a lie.

This creates so much shame, judgment, non-acceptance of our naturalness. We end up hating our bodies, disconnecting from it’s innate intelligence, and comparing ourselves to others.

We base our self-worth on being the perfect shape, weight, or size.

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372 Hits

Giving Yourself and Others Room to Grow

runners-tying-running-shoes-and-getting-ready-to-run-picture-id864384892 Giving Yourself and Others Room to Grow

There is one essential ingredient missing in most of our relationships -- one that is definitely required if we wish to continue in our own development and help others to do the same. What is this powerful catalyst that only we can provide for each other? Room in which to grow.

We can help others reach higher by simply agreeing, consciously, to give them space to go through their changes even when these changes may challenge our sense of self and its well-being. As just one simple example of how to help in this way, we must each learn to keep ourselves quiet when the actions of someone close to us start to disturb us. Why is this new kind of self-silence so important for the growth of both parties involved?

To begin with, the disturbance that we feel in these moments is caused by a tremor in us. This is to say that our shaky sense of self is an effect of some picture we have held of this person as it hits the ground and shatters. Apart from our children, whom we must guide through their developing years, we need to learn to leave people alone with their decisions and corresponding actions. There is already a truth, a wisdom that supports this conscious course of action.

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221 Hits

Is Your Self-Help Helping?

selfhelp Is Your Self-Help Helping?

Market studies show that the personal development/self-improvement industry is growing at a rapid pace. More and more people are spending more and more money to help them lose weight, improve relationships, manage stress, attain success, increase productivity, achieve balance, and find fulfillment.

Yet despite the increase of people investing in self-help tools, techniques, technologies, teachers, and coaches, daily I hear from people who are stuck. They feel helpless, resigned, and frustrated after months or years of: 

  • being on diet and exercise routines yet not seeing a shift in their weight or inches
  • trying to adhere to a budget yet never getting out of debt
  • practicing yoga and meditation daily yet still being consumed/paralyzed by stress and anxiety
  • looking for “the one” yet finding no one special
  • wanting to start, ramp up, or change careers yet continuing to sit at the same desk or lie on the same couch

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518 Hits

What it Takes to Stay Married: Creating a Conscious Partnership

What-It-Takes-to-Stay-Married-iStock-184940353-min Creating a Conscious Partnership

Are you one of those people who would rather be right than loved? Here’s the chance to choose differently.” –Jan Desai

I’m a statistic: twice divorced and almost ten years into my third marriage. If you’re a numbers person, the statistics are stacked against me.

In the U.S., fifty percent of first marriages end in divorce with 67 percent of second and 73 percent of third marriages ending in divorce.

It appears that happily ever after really doesn’t exist.

But this time around I’m committed to something different. I’ve learned a thing or two about navigating the bumpy roads of relationships and I wish to share my greatest discovery in ensuring that the statistics don’t get the best of me… or you!

It’s called conscious partnering.

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1059 Hits

From Postpartum Depression to Mindful Self-Compassion

newborn From Postpartum Depression to Mindful Self-Compassion

I have this memory from 1990 of feeling like my little baby and I were all alone in the universe. The love that I felt for him was heartbreaking. I could sit and watch him sleep for hours, waiting for his little cherub lip to quiver in his slumber. Everything else in my life felt too bright, too loud, too something… too raw. My body was a disaster, and my mind wasn’t too far behind. The only bright spot was the baby.

I had flashbacks of giving birth for months. It was terrifying and excruciating. They call it a precipitous delivery, when your cervix dilates from 4 to 10 centimeters in less than 10 minutes. His head was stuck behind my tailbone and they were pushing so hard on my back that it felt like it broke. The anesthesiologist wouldn’t give me an epidural because they didn’t have an IV running. She responded to my screams for drugs: “You’re not getting any drugs, honey; your baby is coming out now.” It felt like someone was cutting my body open with an axe and pulling out my organs — and that was a vaginal delivery!

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500 Hits

Don’t Give Up

dontgineup What's the most important thing?

The most important thing is to remember the most important thing.

The Practice: Don't Give Up.

Why?

Have you heard this saying?

The most important thing is to remember the most important thing.

What are the most important things to you? In your life as a whole? During a particular interaction with someone? Right this minute?

The most important things often get pushed to the sidelines. Urgent crowds out important. Modern life is full of distracting clamor, from text messages and emails to window displays in the mall. Other people tug at you with their priorities - which may not be your own. And it can feel scary to admit what really matters to you, tell others, and go after it for real: the fearful voices whisper in the back of the mind: What if you fail?

But if you don't make a sanctuary for what is important, it will get overrun by the bermuda grass of B and C priorities.

How?

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688 Hits

How Do You Forgive Yourself and Those In Your Life

forgivemenots How Do You Forgive Yourself and Those In Your Life

We have all done things that we regretted, that we felt bad about and judged ourselves for.

Whether it was:

The choices you made in a past relationship.

The way you handled a break up.

The life you thought you should have had.

What are you still judging yourself for?

Judging what you did in the past keeps you stuck in the past. You can’t change the past no matter how much you judge.

Holding yourself hostage to your past only serves to limit your ability to create your future.

Embrace that you are human. You will make “mistakes”. Your soul incarnated onto this planet to learn, grow and evolve. The way you grow is through experiences and lessons.

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1124 Hits

Enhance Your Life into perfect health

dogwalk Enhance Your Life into perfect health
Stress can attack us at various levels, choosing to hassle us from various walks of life. Different aspects need handling differently, or we may say that stress relief will also come to us from many different directions.

There are so very many stress relief tools at our disposal, yet we need to understand our own inherent temperament and choose what suits us the best.

Stress is not only a mind game as we are taught to believe, but the body is equally involved. According to me ''Stress is actually an expression of our mind-body connection'' Whatever we think manifests itself as an expression through our body, in the form of illness or joyfulness. So in order to keep our mind-body connect in tandem and ourselves stress-free we need to find a simple strategy which will help us to Relax or de-stress our minds in such a way that we can reverse the body's stress response in order to avoid the negative effects of stress.
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337 Hits

Learning To Love Your Cellulite, Stomach, and Scars

bodylove Learning To Love Your Cellulite, Stomach, and Scars

I hope you are enjoying the beginning of summer. I am literally moving very slowly into summer since I had a procedure a few weeks ago that has curtailed my normal activity.

Several years ago, I had a pain in the area of my lower abdomen which was so acute that at times I could not sit up straight. After seeing several doctors, they determined I had a growth on my ovaries. At the time, they treated it with antibiotics and made the decision to monitor it regularly. Since the mass continued to grow, this past February my gynecologist suggested I consult with a specialist. Not thinking anything of it, I scheduled the appointment in between my workout and work day. I figured the most the doctor would tell me was that I needed to have the growth removed, which, in my mind, would be a quick outpatient procedure.

Determined not to miss a beat in my day, I arrived at the specialist’s office juggling my iPhone and iPad. Now, I must admit that I was a bit taken aback when I found out that the doctor I was seeing was a gynecologic oncologist, located in the new “Cancer Institute” building of the hospital. However, I shook it off and kept my eye on the prize which was trying to get in and out in under two hours.

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434 Hits

30 Simple Ways to Create Balance and Connection

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...on all things life, wellness, love, transformation and spirituality...

 PLUS! Get your FREE Guide: 12 Mindfulness Practices to a Peaceful Mind