It's easy to forget that we are all perfect in our own design. Sometimes we muck it up with habits and choices that do not serve us. 

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Leave the "Victim Level" of Life Behind You

When faced with any pain or grief -- past, present, or promised -- the first thing our lower nature, the "me mind," usually asks is: "What's to be done? Who can I speak to about it? What's the best way for me to handle it? Is there any way out?" And at the heart of these complaints, whether detected or not, is the me mind's favorite question: "Why does everything happen to me?"
 

But at the root of each of these fearful questions which seem to seek a way out of the sorrow lies a secret assumption, one that keeps us defeated and going around in sad circles. And the deception in this assumption of ours is so habitual that if it weren't for the existence of a higher order of self, with its powers of higher perception, this subtle betrayal would be complete. What is this unconscious assumption that almost none can see?
 

The deception begins with the assumption that whatever your current pain may be, it must be real. And, more importantly, hidden in this same unsuspected assumption, is the wrong reasoning that since that ache is lodged in your heart -- it must follow that that pain belongs to you.
 

Even if you doubt the existence of a higher, happier life level, the following is beyond all doubt: living from a mind that automatically assumes suffering is real, gives you no choice other than to remain a perpetual victim. This defeated inner condition is the same as being sentenced to a life of perpetual sadness and resentment. Our lives aren't meant to be spent in this wasteful way. Following is a new and much higher way to look at, and solve, this very old problem.
 

The next time any sadness, or worry of any kind, calls for you, slow the whole of yourself down and work to quietly observe yourself.

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How to Settle the Mind During a Crisis

At first only a few voices spoke of positive change after the COVID crisis ends, or at least becomes livable once again. Now one hears a chorus calling for change, much of it from younger people. The main message is about global cooperation and preparing better for the next pandemic. But I think people are pondering personal change, too. In the midst of widespread trepidation, what are the new goals that each of us might start pursuing right now?

 

The first goal should be a settled mind. Fear is persuasive and panic easily goes viral. At the best of times most people turn their backs on worrisome problems rather than dealing with them directly. But unless you have been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, you can settle your mind and go beyond fear. The first steps to gaining mastery over fear are open to everyone, as follows.

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Flowing Down a Mountain

My personal and most memorable experience of accessing a state of FLOW was entirely unplanned. It occurred while snow skiing, finding a single focus, through repetitive, harmonious movement, carving left to right, left to right, like a snake down a slope. No resistance. Moving in fear, to move past it. (Fear is after all just our ego (false-self) trying to protect us).

It was Valentine’s Day 2002, I was on a ski trip in the Alps with a boyfriend, but we were in no way having the romantic experience that information might conjure up. 

We were staying in the same ski resort in Austria I’d honeymooned at in my early twenties (it was disastrous as honeymoons go and a catalyst for our divorce just 6 months later). But it was here, where I had fallen in love with skiing.

Just a few weeks before this trip, I had chosen to abort a pregnancy. While making this choice very consciously, I was still recovering both physically and emotionally. I was not in love. Our relationship was already over. I still harboured unreconciled feelings for someone else back in South Africa. And on this day, the 14th of February — being the birthday of my childhood sweetheart and soul mate who had died in a car accident at the age of 23, while drinking and driving — to say that I was a walking, breathing emotional volcano, showing tangible signs of erupting, would not be an over dramatisation. The seismic activity in my system was real.

 

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Love In or Lock Down

Every action has an intention. Even not acting and not speaking are actions, and each has an intention. Your intention is the most important thing, not what you do. Your intention is why you do what you do. For example, imagine that you are hiking with a friend, and she suddenly pushes you violently off the trail. If she pushes you because she sees a rattlesnake, and she intends to keep you safe, her push comes from love. She cares about you. If she pushes you because she intends to keep herself safe, her push comes from fear. She cares about herself.

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Reclaiming Your Power When You Feel Like Life’s Out of Control

Are you feeling frayed around the edges, like you’re not sure how much longer you can hold it all together? 

If so, you’re not alone!

A lot of us are starting to feel like we’re nearing the end of our rope. I mean, this has been going on for a long time now! The daily anxiety, the death counts, the news — it just seems to go on and on. 

Even those of us who started out really strong (or maybe just in denial!), and we thought, “This will be over soon…” Well, “soon” has come and gone and here we still are! Depending where you are in the world, you may not even have passed the peak yet, and you may be wondering how much more you can take.

The news wants to feed the Fear Virus and paint a picture of doom and gloom, and we have to counter it with signs of hope. Yes, there is devastation around us — I don’t want to ignore or downplay that. But I also want to remind you that there is a pattern here. And as hard as it is to believe, this too shall pass. 

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Soul Agreements

We each come into our human lifetimes with an individual soul plan, which we then forget at birth. God, however, remembers, and God’s presence as the soul continuously reminds us of that plan. What may seem a complete falling apart of everything in your life is really only a divine rerouting to keep you on course for what you agreed to experience, and expand with, before you incarnated. Your soul always remembers. When you begin to live consciously as your soul, you won’t feel so blindsided by life events. At the highest and deepest levels, everything is unfolding as it is meant to.

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Choosing Trust Over Fear

We’re living in unprecedented times. Every day brings new challenges and new STUFF… it truly is an extraordinary time in human history. It’s easy to feel like we’re lost. We don’t know what the heck to do with what’s happening all around us because we’ve never been through this before!

Especially if we or someone close to us is ill (or we think they might be…), it can be hard to pull our focus from the negative. 

Just a few weeks ago, I got really sick. I had just come back from Chile, and I had all the symptoms… but no one was really talking about Coronavirus at that point. I had all of it — the fever, the bronchial stuff. And because I have asthma, I was especially concerned. 

There was a moment there where I literally thought I was going to die. I lost my eyesight and actually fell down in the bathroom. It was scary. I couldn’t do anything, just lie in bed. I had no voice, no energy. 

It could have been easy to sink into that, and then compound it with guilt over having to cancel events (and I NEVER cancel events!). 

But I remember saying to myself, “I can either bemoan what’s going on for me and get scared, or I can sit in gratitude, yes, even for this.” So in the worst of my illness, I kept saying, “Okay, Spirit, if it’s my turn, just… okay.” 

And three times a day for half an hour, I’d just sit there and listen to uplifting music like Deva Premal, Enya, Joni Mitchell, and Stevie Nicks. I would put my hand on my heart and stay super grateful and get really chill. And it helped. 

Listen, I’m not saying that Enya can cure COVID (but who really knows, right?!)

What I am saying is that we can find comfort, even when we’re living in uncertainty. 

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Emotional Intelligence: Escaping the Matrix of Fear

For many young people, the COVID virus outbreak will bring their first experience of fear and anxiety as a pervasive mood. As a society we are afraid of fear, and most of the time we can turn our backs on it. But this kind of denial is unworkable in a crisis. As bad news mounts daily and society becomes ever more anxious, countless people become enmeshed in the matrix of fear without knowing how to escape.

Social forces can drive you to participate in the matrix of fear, but society cannot get you out of it. Escape is something each person must confront on their own. I believe that freeing yourself from fear and anxiety is possible. More than that, you can learn how to be free of fear long after the COVID crisis has passed.

The key is to cultivate emotional intelligence. The term had a burst of attention some years ago, but the value of emotional intelligence never changes, and when you focus on it, you will achieve something worthwhile for life.  Here are six principles to guide you through the process.

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How To Deal With Fear

We are going through some intense times right now in the world.

Many of us are worried about our safety and how we take care of ourselves and those we love.

I believe that we will get through this together, and we can get through these times stronger.

In dealing with COVID-19, it is important to be smart, discerning and intentional in doing our part to ensure we take care of ourselves and those around us, our loved ones, our elderly and our children.

It is important that we focus on what we can control, not on what we cannot. This will only create more fear and panic. We can take responsibility for building up our immune system with rest, sleep, hydration, supplements (i.e: Vitamin C, echinacea, ginger, turmeric, oregano oil, etc.).

What you focus on expands.

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Coronavirus – Opportunity Or Obstacle?

Corona usually refers to an aura (visible appearance) of plasma (ionized gas) around the sun. The coronavirus that is infecting humans for the first time (which is why we have no immunity) is covid-19. It is a type of coronavirus, just as “rose” is a type of flower. Yet covid-19 is a bloodless, lifeless term with no emotional relevance to human experience. That is why, in my opinion, we continue to call the virus that has infected us the coronavirus. We sense that it is intimately related to us humans.

As we become multisensory – able to perceive beyond the limitations of the five senses – we begin to see that everything around us is symbolic. The world is no longer random and meaningless. It is filled with meaning, and we can learn about ourselves from it. What can we learn about ourselves from the coronavirus?

The corona of the sun extends millions of miles into space and is hugely hotter than the visible surface of the sun. It is not detectable without instruments, except during a solar eclipse, but it is real and its effects upon the Earth are real. Is there an invisible part of us that extends far beyond what our five senses can detect and whose effects upon us are large and real? Yes. There are many, and we call one of them our collective consciousness.

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There's No Going Back

"Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door!" -Emma Lazarus


I've Been Thinking...

This was the week when it really dawned on me that life is never going back to “normal.” Well, at least it won’t be the normal we knew just a few short weeks ago.


It wasn’t any one thing that made me come to this realization. Let’s just say there were enough different things this week that brought me to this place. The rise of infections. The doomsday predictions that the worst is yet to come. The pictures of makeshift hospitals and funeral homes. The new recommendations to wear face masks if you go out of your house. The rise of domestic abuse cases. And the startling number of 10 million new unemployment claims!


In the last few weeks alone, 10 million people in the U.S. have filed for unemployment benefits. Ten million individuals. Ten million of our neighbors, our friends, our fellow families. It seemed like almost every conversation I had this week involved heartache and loss. The loss of a job, the loss of a business, the loss of a dream, the loss of a friend. And in my own family, the loss of a child and grandchild.

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Embracing Your Biggest Fears

By acknowledging and facing fears, we can reach the other side.

By all accounts, Nelson Mandela was one of the greatest people ever to walk the face of the earth. In his 95 years, he rose from small-town law student to President of South Africa, all despite being held as a political prisoner for 27 years.

As someone who could have easily lived the rest of his life in fear and bitterness, Mandela took the high road, overcoming and embracing his fears for the betterment of the world.

Among his many memorable quotes is one that really stands out: “The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.”

It’s a powerful statement.

I believe if you examine your own life, you’ll probably find that it rings true for you, too.

The fact is, fear is a learned behavior.

When we’re born, we only have a natural fear of two things: loud noises and falling backward.

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Look Out for One Another

There is so much fear ricocheting around the globe now. Fear of the deadly coronavirus and fear of disease and dying. Basically, fear of survival. This survival-based fear is embedded deep in our cellular memory as a species on this planet; it is a powerful force affecting everyone. Our collective consciousness holds the emotional residue of every event—wars, famine, pandemics, natural and man-made disasters, etc.—and all that is coming up to be released so that we can reach a new planetary balance. Mostly we aren’t aware of the rebalancing yet, but it is happening. As the virus spreads, we feel both present and cumulative fear, as well as other strong emotions like sadness, anger, or panic.

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Beach Closed: No Lifeguard on Duty

Several years ago we were vacationing on the insanely beautiful island of Capri in Italy.

One afternoon we went for a walk, searching for a beach, to take a swim in the refreshing, sparkling Mediterranean sea.

We eventually found one and hiked down to a sweet little cove with a sandy beach jammed packed with men, women and children, in all shape and sizes.

As we waded into the water, I noticed a small canoe-like boat that was painted red and on the side were the words, in big block letters, Salvatore.

My first thought was,

“I wonder who Salvatore is and why does he need his name so boldly on the boat?”

And, even though I don’t speak Italian, I soon figured out that it Salvatore wasn’t some man’s name but rather it means “Savior,” and that this was a boat used by lifeguards.

As all of us navigate through these scary and difficult times of the COVID-19 virus, it’s becoming clear that there aren’t enough lifeguards right now, and it’s really up to us to figure out how to rescue ourselves and our loved ones.

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The Heart of Peace

During challenging times, such as the one we are currently experiencing, it is often quite difficult to remain calm and centered. Fear and anxiety dominate the collective consciousness, and we start to slide into negative thinking and feelings of overwhelm. We forget that at our core is unshakable calm and peace.

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Overcoming The Fear

There is so much fear right now. Can you feel it?

A lot of people are struggling right now; struggling with the fear of the virus, the fear of getting infected, fear of losing someone close to them, the fear of contaminating others. But beyond the virus itself there is also the fear of isolation, the fear of loss of income or loss of a job, the inability to take care of your family, and the great fear of what the future now looks like. 

So how is this fear affecting us?


It is infiltrating our systems. The level of fear is so high right now it has become toxic to our way of thinking, our actions, our words, and our energy.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not negating that we have to be safe and take the necessary precautions, especially those of us with a weak immune system. Caution is SO IMPORTANT right now in dealing with conflicts in front of us.  But when precautions come from fear instead of self-care, it activates chaos which in turn spreads and grows. 

Through all of this, my  spirit has strongly guided me to say something to you as we are all facing circumstances that we’ve never faced in our lifetime. I feel called to speak on the tools we all possess to overcome the fear that’s weighing heavily within us and around us.

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The Habit of Fear

Weeks ago, I was awoken in the middle of the night by coyotes just outside our house. They paused their trek long enough to loudly share a secret. One call, in particular, kept me awake. It sounded like spooky maniacal laughter. The next day I asked the dogs if they understood the message.

This morning there were flash flood warnings, rain, and lightning storms. I waited for a break in the storm before I headed up the hiking trail. I wore sandals because I needed to feel closer to the Earth. Supreme (my trail pup) and I slowly walked and splashed our way up the empty trail enjoying the mud and water in the washes. The rain brought out sweet and earthy smells from the plants and the birds were loudly sharing their insight. We could hear the coyotes far away. At the top, I took a picture of myself enjoying the clouds and open space. On our way down the mountain, we began to run into other people.  It was so good to share a moment of peace and happiness; a wonderful connection.

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The Most Dangerous Virus

Many people are speaking now and frequently about fear – of the political situation, unstable markets and weather, and now, a virus. Concern about the virus is now surpassing the other fears that frightened parts of our personalities put on inner display daily for us, if we are willing to look at (experience) them instead of distracting ourselves with food, work, sex, obsessions, and addictions. As we take these inner displays seriously and begin to explore them, a surprising discovery becomes observable, then noticeable, then unavoidable – the most invasive virus that we can experience today is fear. It is contagious, spreads quickly, and dangerous. It puts our ability to give the gifts that we were born to give at risk, and a life without giving them is a life of emotional pain, psychological pain, physical pain, every kind of pain.

There is no vaccine against fear, but there is a way to be healthy again if you become infected: Create authentic power. Frightened parts of your personality generate pain (you are infected when this happens) and loving parts of your personality relieve you of it when you cultivate them repeatedly (you become healthy again when this happens).

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Being Resilient During Coronavirus

During times like this, it’s natural to feel afraid, anxious, or threatened. The brain has evolved to react quickly to threats, and it’s easy for there to be a sense of helplessness associated with problems that appear far beyond our control.

But being consumed by fear causes wear and tear on the body, which actually undermines your safety. That’s why it’s so important to look for ways to be effective and express our agency, even if it’s only through how we choose to think about things.

Below you’ll find suggestions and resources for how to do just that during this challenging time. Please share this page widely. These resources are free for all.

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Be Here and Be Calm

Some call our current situation a pandemic.

I call this era in history “The Great Calm”

The “Great Depression” in the 1930’s sparked a wave of fear and scarcity.

The “Great Calm” happening now is a wave of Peace. A worldwide harmony, far beyond anything ever experienced.

My contribution to the Great Calm is the Harmony Refresh.

A Heartful Harmony Refresh is a simple skill with three easy steps,
• feel your physical heartbeat
• be aware of your breath
• relax your body and settle into calm

As the world slows down and stops to pause, we will be able to amplify our personal experience of Harmony, reduce fear and increase calm in the world!

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30 Simple Ways to Create Balance and Connection

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