Have you ever been so upset, so disturbed by someone, that if you didn’t lash out at them, you were sure the whole world would come crashing down on you? When you and I get upset with someone, our attention is instantly glued onto the source of our irritation. All we do is think about the irritation we have and how it’s connected to what someone else has done.
When you’re upset with someone or something, you have no consciousness of yourself at all. You are only conscious of what you say he, she, or it is making you feel. You are completely outwardly oriented in order to justify your inward agitation.
At the moment you see a person or an event as being responsible for this irritation, what you are actually seeing is your experience of the moment. So really what you’re experiencing isn’t the person, but the content of your own past experience in its narrow confines.