It's easy to forget that we are all perfect in our own design. Sometimes we muck it up with habits and choices that do not serve us.
I want to go slow this morning. I want to ease my way into your heart and mind.
After all, entry into those spaces is sacred. I know that. It always has been. But, now it’s really sacred, and it’s something I take seriously.
It’s scary out there, right? It’s scary, and it’s noisy as hell. There is so much trying to make its way into your mind, and very little of it benefits you personally (please see my interview with the director of the new film "The Social Dilemma" below about this very issue). It is challenging to navigate all of the information and/or misinformation coming your way. If you aren’t vigilant, it can make you feel, well... crazy.
Speaking of crazy, I don’t use that word lightly. Anyone who has felt crazy in their life, or who has been made to feel like they are losing their mind, knows how triggering it can be to be told you’re crazy, or that you don’t know what you are talking about, or that what you are saying or seeing isn’t true. That said, we are in crazy-making times. Perhaps you feel crazy like I do when people insist the pandemic is a hoax despite the fact that more than 200,000 Americans have lost their lives. It’s crazy-making that a young woman can be killed in her home and no one is held responsible for her death. It’s crazy-making when the President of the United States floats the idea that he might not leave the White House, even if he loses. What??
That’s why it’s more important than ever to try your best to stay sane. It’s critical to develop the inner resources or tools to fight back and to keep your wits about you. Easier said than done, I know. But there is hope.
Last week I learned about something that sounds kind of crazy, but is something I think might help you. It’s definitely helped me. It’s called the "personal craziness index" (PCI). Yes, it’s a real thing, and it’s no laughing matter. A friend told me about it and then shared his crazy index with me. It was fascinating, to say the least.
The PCI is a way of not only knowing yourself, but of keeping yourself in check. It was developed by Patrick Carnes, a legendary figure in the addiction space. (Those in the addiction movement might have known about it, but I didn’t.)
I got to thinking that maybe we should all know about the PCI because maybe it can help us all feel just a little bit saner in these crazy-making times. Maybe it will help you in your relationship with yourself and with others. Who doesn’t need that?
We all have things that trigger our craziness—that simply makes us human. Knowing your triggers is just smart. It’s also helpful to know the triggers of those you care about because you are going to trip up on them, for sure. I know I have.
One of my friend’s crazy-making triggers is being late. His wife and I were late to lunch the other day, and he got triggered. (He had to rate himself, ‘cause it wasn’t pretty). I learned something in the process, though, and it wasn’t just don’t be late. By sharing his crazy-making index with me, my friend taught me that there were other things that made him feel like he’s going nuts. Just like there are many things that make me feel the same. I’m sure it’s the same for you.
It makes me crazy when I feel like I’m not being heard. It makes me crazy when I say no and no one seems to hear me. It makes me crazy when I’ve asked my kids to pick up their stuff and then they leave it on the floor anyway (again, making me feel like I’m not being heard or respected). Certain political discussions trigger me. Lack of sleep does, too. You get the drift. My personal crazy index goes on, and it’s my responsibility to own it, rate it, and share it when appropriate and keep myself as balanced as I can.
It’s simply a tool, and we all need tools right now to help us maintain sanity and take back some control over our lives. The next month is going to be crazy, and I’ve got a feeling that it’s not going to calm down after the election. That’s why it’s up to each of us to work on our emotional, mental, and physical health. It’s up to each of us to be mindful of what we allow into our hearts and our minds. It’s sacred territory, after all, and you, my friend, are the guardian.
PRAYER OF THE WEEK
Dear God, please guard my heart and mind. Please help me be mindful of what I need to feel sane during these times and to be brave enough to speak up for what I need. Amen.
Join Panache Desai every morning and for support in reconnecting to the wellspring of calm and peace that lives within you and that has the power to counterbalance all of the fear, panic, and uncertainty that currently engulfs the world.
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