After four weeks of lying flat on my back in traction with a broken neck, no mobility or feeling in both my arms and one of my legs, I got a visit from the ‘expert doctors’.
At 20 years old I was told that I wasn’t responding to any of the treatments and I was going to be paralyzed for the rest of my life.
“The rest of my life!” rang in my head over and over and over. With a tsunami twirling in my stomach, my heart pounding out of my chest I immediately blurted out; “I don’t think so doc, that’s not my plan!”
I don’t remember much after that because my inner chatter went ballistic, overflowing with worst case scenarios. My mind had dropped a movie screen right down in front of me so I could watch the story of my life as a quadriplegic.
As I watched in horror, I saw my mom spoon feeding me, brushing my teeth, shaving my face, combing my hair, wiping my butt and dressing me. Being chauffeured everywhere I needed to go, never to ride a bike, a motorcycle or drive my car again. Thinking if I was lucky enough to have a wife, I would never be able to wrap my arms around her or be able to hold our baby in my arms.
My life was over. I would rather be dead than paralyzed, I thought. My stomach was churning like a cement mixer, my heart had a hole in it as wide as the Grand Canyon and every cell of my body was flooded with fear, at least the ones I could feel.
Once the doctor left, I remember telling the nurse not to let anyone in to visit me that day, no one. I laid motionless the entire day to sort out all the emotions that were flooding my body. It was the longest twenty-four hours of my life. I ended that self-induced pity party, by making a decision.
I decided that I was going to heal myself.
I had no idea how or how long it would take. I didn’t even know where to start. I just knew that I was going to heal myself and get all the feeling and movement back in my body!
At that moment, nothing changed. Nothing! I was still paralyzed. I still couldn’t move my arms or my leg. And I was still in immense pain from the mass of contracted spasming muscles throughout my back and neck. Nothing was different.
Yet, everything was different.
By making this firm, unwavering decision energy was put in to motion. The Universe with its infinite intelligence was immediately working to bring this healing about. The Universe was conspiring on my behalf to give me the guidance to heal myself. I couldn’t see any of it. I felt it. I felt it in my heart. It was a knowing...a faith and trust that the moment I made that decision my world would be different. Back to normal. I just didn’t know when. Or how.
There is great power in making a decision. When you can believe in yourself enough along with the intelligence of the Universe all around you, you can do anything.
Just like my decision that day in the hospital, that decisive decision allowed the unseen world, the unlimited Intelligent Universe to align circumstances in my favor. The Universe arranges people to show up in your world, rearranges time, energy and situations that work for you to achieve the goal you’ve decided upon.
We have been taught and programmed to have a plan and work that plan. Yet rarely do any of our achievements or goals go according to the plan we had for ourselves.
Something different and usually better always unfolds if we follow our hearts.
It’s by listening to our hearts and using our imaginations to see the end result as we want it, that overrides the fear and negative chatter that tries to control us.
Whether it’s a huge decision like I made that life changing day or small decisions on a daily basis you have choice. You have been blessed with the power to choose. Every living, breathing moment, you are making a choice.
What to eat, how to move, how to react, how to breathe, what information to consume, what desires to indulge in, how much to work, how much to play, who to connect with, how to care for yourself…
It is said that we make 35,000 decisions a day. Over 200 of them are related to food and even more are related to your health.
You get to decide what you ingest. What foods will you put in your body that make you feel good and healthy? How much water will your drink?
We also get to decide what thoughts and information we want to ingest. Who and what you are listening to and being influenced by?
For example: are you listening, watching or playing violent games that tear you down or positive things that lift you up? What do you watch on TV and your devices?
The information and entertainment that you ‘ingest’ through your eyes can either build you up or create more fear, anger, insecurity and aggression in your body and cells.
My invitation to you is to know that you have choice, even when society dictates otherwise. Please remember when making a decision big or small, have your conscious mind and your heart work together with your heart leading the way. When you let your mind be the powerful tool to carry out your heart’s desire you can create anything you truly want.
There is great power in making a decision if you believe in the power of you which is the infinite power of the universe.
Join Panache Desai each weekday morning for support in reconnecting to the wellspring of calm and peace that lives within you and that has the power to counterbalance all of the fear, panic, and uncertainty that currently engulfs the world.
Designed To Move You From Survival and Fear to Safety and Peace. Available Monday - Friday. Meditation begins at 9 AM. Access early to hear Panache's monologue - around 8:30 AM.
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