What do I want

What Do I Want?  - Frank Leonesio

If you are comfortable with the basics of getting to a meditative state, you are ready to take a very big leap that will bring you to a higher level of awareness through self-inquiry. The next big step is to ask the question, What do I want? The way to do this is to settle into your meditation and then deliberately address this question to the universe. You can also address this question to a spiritual guide, your higher-self, god, or any place you have had experience retrieving information.

This should not be a question you force but should be arrived at by exploring your emotions before you begin your meditation. You are asking the universe to help you here so you must have a genuine desire for an answer. The universe responds to true desires that it can sense from your being state, so your desire to know must be genuine.

This exercise may expand on what you already think you want or refocus your desire in another direction. The first test of this exercise will be getting comfortable with the information that you will get back. It may seem strange if you have not practiced self-inquiry before; you may think you are making it up or it just feels unnatural in the beginning. Don’t struggle with this just let the information come in and be aware of it. Above all do not judge it as it comes into your awareness just pay attention, nothing more.

Once you receive an answer you may have a desire to act on this information. You can do this by forming an intention, that will lead to manifesting a desire that has come up as a result of this new information. When you are ready you will form a thoughtful intention just as you would during any meditation and send that out into the universe or your alternative asking for its help.

I suggest asking the “what do I want” question often in your practice, it can bring you back to issues you should focus on but don’t realize. Many people begin every meditation session with this question.

At this level you are communicating in very subtle (higher frequencies) of consciousness and this is where the higher intelligence and experiences are that you can access. This information might come from the subconscious, the soul, or the greater field of awareness we call Existence Consciousness (EC).

I will offer a little more guidance on working with the “what do I want question.” If you need clarification about what is coming in ask short but very clear questions once the flow of information has stopped. Information coming in from a higher source can be disarming as it may be much different than an expectation you may have had.

Surrender to uncertainty, let go of any attachment to an outcome, let the information comingle with your awareness in all of your exchanges. Accepting information that may seem different than what you had been thinking in the waking state is part of the evolutionary path. It is a big step forward, have courage. A note here: accessing your subconscious is a higher conscious level experience; there is much information that exists there we do not have access to in our waking state.

We become the things that we experience, think about, investigate, form an intention to create and are inspired (in-Spirit) to create. This is the positive love of the north pole of duality. The negative south pole of duality is fear.

You can make a choice to turn your south pole experiences into a north pole experiences. You can do this by embracing the negative experiences that come from some fear or emotion. An embedded fear can arise through any normal experience, those are the ones that should be explored. A fear can also be the result of a long-held belief that is no longer working for you i.e., I am not good enough, I am not smart enough, people don’t like me etc.

Another word for letting go of a fear or old belief is surrender. By surrendering your fears to the universe, EC, your higher self, or God you can be a dispassionate observer. You will observe your intentions being manifested without suffering the emotional pain of the ups and downs of the process. This is a well vetted out concept in many traditions and practiced around the world. I bring this up here because what we want is often related to remembering an underlying fear that is preventing us from reaching a state of peace and serenity. For more on this read my blog on Surrender.

The way to explore fears is after settling into your meditation ask What do I fear? This exercise is like the “what do I want” protocol. This should not be a question you force but should be arrived at by the desire to explore your negative emotions during you meditation. In this meditative state you are emotionally neutral because you are bypassing the survival mind or ego where those emotions exist.

Form an intention to find the root cause of the fear. You may know the answer if not go backward in time, even to your early childhood until you discover it. If it is stress or depression, it is usually connected to a past event. If the emotion is anxiety it is connected to a future event, and you will need to explore that the same way. Find the fear from the past that is creating the anxiety.

Explore each event as you go backward in time. Sometimes it will take a few meditations to get to the source. Along the way you will notice patterns in your behavior. Make a note of all your negative patterns so that you can recognize them when they arise in you while in the waking state.

Even if you think you know the answer to this question, I recommend going through this exercise. It can also change your perspective on a particular fear by giving you more information about it. Put the “what is causing my fear” question out into the universe for answers. Let the information come in and reflect on it over the next several days, become friends with it, understand its source, make your peace with it, and then do the following:

The mind is susceptible to suggestion that is why hypnosis is possible. The power of auto suggestion can be used to remove a fear from your subconscious. The fear has probably been lurking there for a long time sabotaging you in different ways you were not aware of before.

Create a powerful but simple suggestion to eliminate the fear or habitual negative routine you are in. As an example, tell the subconscious that you no longer believe in what is causing the underlying fear. You have accepted it, understand it as a lesson and embrace it as a gift to you for the evolution of your consciousness. You will no longer be responsive to it. Ask the subconscious to eliminate the fear now.

Depending on the level of fear you may need to reaffirm this suggestion or form more direct instructions to the subconscious. Make sure you really understand your fear before expressing your instruction to the subconscious. It may be helpful to write out a few auto suggestions to find the one that is most powerful. You can change these auto suggestions from meditation to meditation as long as they express the same instruction in general. For more information read my blog The Subconscious.




Book by Frank Leonesio

When Frank Leonesio entered a great downturn of depression, alcoholism, marital separation, and a spiritual crisis, he believed his life had come to an end. But only after abandoning everything and going into self-exile would he find a path to a new reality based on consciousness research.

Leonesio has devoted decades to researching human consciousness, not only from his personal experiences but from the disciplines of science, philosophy, theology, and the wisdom traditions of India and China. This led to a new way of being, developed through his own creation of the Peak Mediation Experience (PME) system.

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